What do YOU say?

What various euphemisms do you employ when going to urinate or defecate. I use 'lemon' for lemon dash, ie, slash and dump for sh*t or if I've had a few I announce loudly that I'm going to evacuate my bowels.


In polite society, bodily functions do not need to be described. A simple "excuse me" will suffice. :)
Drain the snake, syphon the python, going for gypsies kiss, going for a tom tit, raking the cage out, laying some cable, dropping the kids off at the pool, the list goes on! I recommened the Viz Profanisaurus for further suggestions...
And don't forget afterwards things like 'you don't buy beeer you only rent it', 'out with the old, in with the new', 'phhoar, I'd give it 10 minutes before going back in there', 'better out than in' and 'fuck me, that was worse than giving birth'.The ladies love all that.