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What Do You Really Want from Life?

No bed, eat the dog, level the house and bloody Yorks Pudding!!

However, really, retirement hut on a nice beach some where with 'Fido' running around - thats the wife by the way!
I recently heard that there was some organisation in Switzerland that will put a roof over your head, feed you, clothe you and give you all the smack your body can handle. After 16 years trying to teach English to pointyheads I think that is something I could aspire to as a way to wind down in my twilight years. Yes. Get to live in the same country as Bryan Ferry, look like him, and all for free!!!!
Pack all this working with nutters sh*te, have enough cash to move to Lindos (Rhodes) and not work again unless I choose, oh, yeah and have the well built bint from the Special K adverts there as my 24/7 sex slave.

As an addenum to the move to Lindos, I should mention the captain's house I purchase there should be re-jigged for British plumbing and electrics..............

My kid settled and to have plenty of acccess to the little blighter so I can train her mother's slackarsed ways out of her (I think she may actually be doing that for herself tho'...lol)

Obviously, a staff of 4 to attend to my every need and to never have to do another piece of fcuking paperwork EVER again!

Oh, and a Goat called Boris..............

And last but not least to see my ex-missus married to her current bloke (Boy do they deserve each other!) it'd be nice to see her shackled to someone just as obnoxious as herself..................
Wide tart with a wide arrse in a wide house with a wide bed on a wide island and drive about my wide island in my fckin wide car smoking my bleedin wide cigar. :p
Jack Daniels, Chicken Tikka Pilau Rice & a naan, my dog, Col U to be promoted & incase SWMBO is reading this ... marry the girlfriend, children, not to goon ops & not to give Cheryl Cole a damn good rifling!
Inter to sell Adriano ( tomorrow if possible!), Mancini back as manager and Danny Dyer as my personal sex slave.

My dog not waking me up to go for a walk when i'm trying to get a lie in would be appreciated too :x
A Victorian Villa by the sea, a boat, a well stocked gunroom, a well stocked cellar, plenty of shooting, £35k PA after tax, an adoring and enthusiastic nymphomaniac gwar....
Probably sounds a bit wet, but on reflection I've already got it.

The rugrats off to the cinema with their auntie; a warm sofa with a cup of tea and a bacon roll; and the Jade Dream stretched out beside me, poking her tongue out over the top of her Macbook while she sticks her eternally cold feet under my sweatshirt and against my side. I don't see how it could get any better.

Edited to add: if I could just crack 'Stalker: Clear Sky', that would be quite nice. Bloody Red Forest, mutter.

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