Welsh Guards mentor Afghan police as CD is launched to support families

Ministry of Defence said:
With the Welsh Guards' recent arrival in Helmand province to mentor and advise the Afghan National Police, a fund has been launched back home to support the troops and their families.

I can see it now.....

CO Welsh Guards: Ah, yes come in Penamster, er and I see you have Afghan- Kandak with you Assalaam Alaikum Afghan

Lt Penamster Jones: Thank you sir.

Afghan K: Waalaikum Assalaam, Colonel. (thinks ... infidel dog)

CO: Penamster, now look here, these fine chaps (indicates Afghan) need a bit of morale building don't you see? How do you think we could achieve a rapid result in increasing unit cohesion and loyalty to the flag?

Afghan K: (thinks .. infidel dogs)

Lt Jones: Well sir I have a cracking idea and a simple one too, shouldnt cost more than a few quid.

CO: I'm interested, Penamster, please tell me your plan.

Afghan K: (thinks ... infidel dogs)

Lt Jones: Well sir, we should form a choir....

CO: What an excellent idea Penamster, do you have any details?

Afghan K: (thinking in Dari.. WTF? are you all barking mad, it was bad enough when the English were here trying to get us to play bloody bingo. Now these Welsh buggers want us to sing in a bloody choir. By the beard of the prophet (may he live in heaven with little girls and boys, goats and hens etc.). This will be the ultimate disgrace.

Lt Jones: Well sir (warming to his theme) we have Jones 453, Jones 234, Jones 554, Jones 176, Jones 889, Jones 673 and Jones 432, who can mentor a couple of guys each and then there's Williams senior, Williams junior, to do soprano training ..... and with the Quartermaster playing the regimental Harp.. well sir I think we have a winner.

Afghan K: (thinking .. they're all as mad as camels that have drunk salt water. Kill the infidels).

CO: By Jove, Penamster I do believe you have a winner here. By G... Err Allah I do.

Lt Jones: We have some wonderful songs we can teach them, I am really looking forward to it.

CO: (with far away look in his eyes). Penamster can you start with a song, something to stir the blood? A good rousing Welsh song, the sort of thing they might sing at rugby?

Afghan K: (Thinking in Dari - Rugby? Songs? What in the name of Allah are these infidel dogs talking about)

Lt Jones: I was thinking of starting them of with Men of Harlech, sir....

CO: Fantastic idea, absolutely fantastic... (far away look in eyes, thinking about a far away African country) ..... By heaven it worked with the Zulu, I can see it working here... Go ahead, Penamster, Ill come to the first choir practice)

Afghan K: Is that all Colonel, I have my goats to molest now .. (thinks - Oh My Sweet Allah, these infidel are truly off the bloody wall)

CO. Ah yes chaps thanks for coming and good luck.
Many attached to the 1Bn WG will remember there own version of the national anthem. Sung at back of parade, with plenty of room to run.
Whales, Whales blo0dy great fishes are Wales,
They swim in the sea and we eat them for tea, etc etc etc.

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