Having logged on to ARRSE a couple of times over the weekend and today, I was quite astounded to note how many inane, irrelevant and ill thought out threads had appeared. Mostly from those either considering joining the army or actually accepted and awaiting to go to Phase 1. So, hereâs a thread for those incapable or too bone idle to research their chosen career. Where bone questions can be asked and rightly mocked. Some examples might be: 1. When I go to Basic Training can I still wear my own pyjamas? 2. My 1.5 mile time is down to 22 minutes, will I pass selection? 3. If I take my SIM card to Phase 1 will it work in an army radio and allow me free calls? 4. My surname is Smith; will I automatically be called Smudge as I prefer Darren? 5. Will other recruits laugh at me in the shower because I have a penis the size of a frozen shrimp? So the rules are quite simple; ensure that your question is as inane as possibly can be; try to word your question in poor English preferably without punctuation and in chav speak; endeavour to pour abusive remarks on those of your betters who answer your question using the derision and sarcasm it so richly deserves. Enjoy â¦ and welcome to Fukwitistan!