Weird Xmas food!!

Discussion in 'Cookery' started by Foreign_Wings_Wearer, Dec 11, 2009.

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  1. I was watching DSTV last night and inbetween watching some mindless TV on the screen came an advert for the latest Xmas fare - "TURDUCKEN"

    I thought WTF!!!!!!! Who would eat a turd !! (no need to answer that!)

    Apparently it’s a Turkey with a de-boned duck and chicken stuffed inside of it, raosted and then served up as the main course. It may taste ok but who in their right mind would buy something called a "Turd"

    Maybe they should have called it a "Duckenkey"?? or "Chickeyuck"??

    OK! lets have some name suggestions for this gastronomic feast or list any other weird Xmas food on the market!
  2. Perhaps they should just call it a 3 Bird Roast and leave it at that.... sometimes simple is best....
  3. didnt Hugh Furry With a Stalk do this some years ago saying it was a meal from way back in the middle ages
  4. It is all these stupid fancy high brow cooking shows that turn people off traditional fayre because it is not chintzy enough.

    So what next? lama, suffed with lamb, stuffed with piglet, stuffed with goose, stuffed with rabbit, stuffed with rat, stuffed with fieldmouse. 8O
  5. Now you're just being silly! {Thinks} Although.................? Mr Fearnley-Whittingstall - I've got an idea!!!
  6. My Grandad always brought out a jar of Pickled Walnuts for the Christmas dinner...

    Black things that looked like preserved floaters!!! But strangely tasty!!
  7. Small fry - a mere morsel of an appetiser.

    The Guinness Book of Records states that roast camel, prepared occasionally for Bedouin wedding feasts, is the biggest dish.

    "Cooked eggs are stuffed into fish, the fish stuffed into cooked chickens, the chickens stuffed into a roasted sheep's carcass and the sheep stuffed into a whole camel."
  8. terroratthepicnic

    terroratthepicnic LE Reviewer Book Reviewer
    1. ARRSE Runners

    Sprouts. Fucking discusting things. I am made to put 2 on my plate every bloody year.
  9. Mate, the answer is to have a FOB jar of Colmans English, dip said sprout into it til coated and chew, you can't taste the sprout cos your taste buds won't be working.
  10. Not necessarily weird, but certainly pointless - Chistmas cake. Dry, crumbly fruit cake smothered in a sickly layer of marzipan and ready to roll icing. Absolutely terrible, but gets wheeled out every year without fail.
  11. Take a leaf out of the Yarpies' (or Zims') book, and make some Hooligan Juice.

    Take Christmas or wedding cake, place in a blender with ice cream and any spirits you can lay your hands on. Blitz.

    You end up with a highly drinkable milk-shake-type beverage which will put you on your back.

    Bizarrely, the only place I've ever seen it on a menu was in the Georgian House in Alderney.
  12. im sure the stuffed bird mega mix goes way back in time to ye olden days when it was 7 birds in all starting with a swan and finishing with a quail! yom yom yom! id rather eat a turd i think!
  13. Mike,
    You would change your mind if you tasted my missus's cake (nudge nudge).
    She made it about 6 weeks ago and every week since she has tipped some alcohol over it (not sure what), but the upshot is that come crimbo, it is lovely and moist and tastes fantastic (the cake isn't bad either).

    Back on thread, the Marks and Sparks leaflet we have ordered our Turkey from has a Turkey, Goose, Duck and Chicken roast which it calls a "Ballotine". Sounds a bit French to me, so should be treated with suspicion. It costs an eye-watering £99!!
  14. Here's the explanation of a Ballotine, basically right, but with a M&S twist :-
  15. terroratthepicnic

    terroratthepicnic LE Reviewer Book Reviewer
    1. ARRSE Runners

    I might as well be, what with the wife and my Mum both going on at me to eat some as it's Christmas. I can't stand Christmas as it is and yet they still make me eat sprouts.

    Saints, I can see where the mustard would work, but then I wouldn't be able to taste the rest of the dinner which will be fabulous, as I usually cook it. :)