Wanking & wanking disasters (merged discussions)

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by error_unknown, Jul 16, 2003.

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  1. Despite having a very attractive wife, I tend to knock out a hand shandy at least once a day.

    Is this normal? or simply a legacy from my days in the Army, when I wanked myself stupid from morning till night.
  2. ..... and you feel it's a problem?
  3. Nothing wrong with that mate. Keep knocking them out. There's now't wrong with a good ham shank everyday. But please be careful. You can go blind, spotty, suffer hand tremours and have a 'salty' smell about you.
  4. Gunny, youve just described Mdn off to a tee!
  5. Bugger me the king of the tuggers is having a pop at me!

    Convoy, there is nothing wrong with buffing the bobbies helmet as regularly as you see fit, its perfectly natural and eases the boredom.

    You know you have a problem though when the porn don't work and you can't raise wood without thinking of a 23st Black woman in a PVC suit rubbing chip fat into the back end of a skip full of offle and giblets.
  6. Photo to follow?
  7. Blatant puffyness in the NAAFI bar should be dealt with swiftly and harshly

    Chaps, Flash is asking for a photo of me polishing my rocket :mrgreen:
  8. Just concerned about your material.

    "thinking of a 23st Black woman in a PVC suit rubbing chip fat into the back end of a skip full of offle and giblets."
  9. Don't worry it's normal ....... so i've been told allthough i might be pushing it at 8 or 9 times aday!!
    anywayl if wa*king makes you go blind, i think i'll keep doing it till i need glasses!

    Now where did i put thouse tissues?????
  10. 8O
    ...about that coffee........ :wink:
  11. Your kidding, right ??!! What comes out? I bet there's not even a 'token trickle' !! How do you keep all that up (pardon the pun)?? You won't go blind mate, your balls will just suck into your stomach !!!
  12. An ejaculation a day may keep prostate cancer at bay

    SYDNEY (Reuters) - Frequent masturbation may be really good for you.

    Research by Australia's Cancer Council Victoria found that the more often men ejaculate between the ages of 20 and 50, the less likely they are to suffer the disease that kills more than half a million men each year.

    The survey of 1,079 prostate cancer patients and 1,259 healthy men found that those who masturbated or had sex at least once a day in their 20s were a third less likely to develop the malady.

    "For men in their 50s of course that's often not achievable," Graham Giles, who led the research team, told Reuters on Thursday.

    "(But) masturbation isn't bad for you. I don't believe in the blindness and hairy palms theory. Prohibitions against ejaculations are not based on science," he said. (Gunny sez - Bollocks, hairy palms are very serious. Look at mine).

    The study, conducted between 1994 and 1998 but still being analysed, did not focus specifically on masturbation.

    Nevertheless, it was the largest so far to ask participants not just about their sexual relations but also about masturbation, and to analyse the answers.

    Giles said the findings correlate with previous research that showed Roman Catholic priests were 30 percent more likely to get prostate cancer, but they contradict other studies that suggested having a variety of partners or frequent sex could lift the risk.

    One theory that could explain the new results is that semen may have a carcinogenic effect on the cells lining the prostatic ducts if not flushed regularly out of the pipes by ejaculations.

    The research is due to be published in this weekend's British Journal of Urology International

    In summary - Keep thrapping off matey !!
  13. Just say when BB!! :twisted: i guess if i can do it that many times why change a habit of a llife time!! theres plenty more than just a token trickle i can assure you that, i guess the only thing that keeps me going is that fact i'm a randy little buggar, with a high sex drive! :roll:
  14. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/3072021.stm

    Masturbation 'cuts cancer risk'

    Researchers were assessing prostate cancer risk
    Men could reduce their risk of developing prostate cancer through regular masturbation, researchers suggest.
    They say cancer-causing chemicals could build up in the prostate if men do not ejaculate regularly.

    Yippeeeeee........... It is official, ham shanking is good for you. All we need now is the word from St Peter that it doesn't count against you at the Pearly Gates :D
  15. Your absolutely guaranteed that wanking is against the Bible, so when you reached the Gates of Heaven, two of Satan's bouncers will be waiting to escort you to the basement department! :twisted: