Vote For Me!

#1
My manifesto contains fcuk all of any use!

I promise to do Fcuk all!

Except for the following 7 point plan!

1. Bring back capital punishment.
2. Suspend all benefit payments to all those classed as spongers.
3. Sever all ties with France.
4. Immigration will cease in most cases.
5. Prisons will be turned back into prisons (slice of bread a day etc).
6. Bonuses for bankers and MPs will be illegal.
7. Members of ARRSE will be employed as my cabinet.

I have more in the pipeline, once i am well established!


What is your manifesto?
 
#2
Count.Dracule said:
My manifesto contains fcuk all of any use!

I promise to do Fcuk all!

Except for the following 7 point plan!

1. Bring back capital punishment.
2. Suspend all benefit payments.
3. Sever all ties with France.
4. Immigration will cease in most cases.
5. Prisons will be turned back into prisons (slice of bread a day etc).
6. Bonuses for bankers and MPs will be illegal.
7. Members of ARRSE will be employed as my cabinet.

I have more in the pipeline, once i am well established!


What is your manifesto?
Pretty similar manifesto plus jailing all of the current govt spongers & their hangers on and confiscating all their assets, houses, pensions etc :twisted: so I'll join as long as we get a HUGE pay rise to compensate for all the fiddles on expenses we would have to stop! :twisted: :twisted:
 
#3
One set of laws for the whole country that apply to everyone, without exception. Break them and suffer the consequences. If you don't like them, leave.
 
#4
Please add one item that makes my alcohol infused blood boil - the cessation of extra benefits payments to Muslims with two or more wives. Yeah I know you said that all benefits would stop, but thats not fair on people with genuine needs. But paying benefits for extra wives in a country where bigamy is a criminal offence just makes me want to learn to play the bagpipes and start killing people.
 
#5
Can I be the Minister of Corrections :D
 
#6
You forgot chaingangs. All prisoners will wear bright orange overalls and will work in a chaingang sweeping streets, removing downed trees etc from rivers, cut OAP's grass and do their gardening.
 
#7
johnboyzzz said:
You forgot chaingangs. All prisoners will wear bright orange overalls and will work in a chaingang sweeping streets, removing downed trees etc from rivers, cut OAP's grass and do their gardening.
That's easy labour.

I'd have the cnuts breaking rocks and shovelling their own shit from one corner of a prison yard to the other and then instigate a coup by building a wall and using it as a defence against the militant guard shift within the prison....

Sorry, wrong forum....
 
#8
I demand to be appointed Witchfinder General: I'll show you what blind religious zealotry is all about.

I don't need paying - but can I keep the pretty ones?
 
#9
Baseplate said:
I demand to be appointed Witchfinder General: I'll show you what blind religious zealotry is all about.

I don't need paying - but can I keep the pretty ones?


Only if you share :twisted:
 
#11
Markintime said:
Anyone wishing to stand for election as an MP must have completed five years colour service.

That's 2/3rds of this site fcuked then!
 
#13
eodmatt said:
Please add one item that makes my alcohol infused blood boil - the cessation of extra benefits payments to Muslims with two or more wives. Yeah I know you said that all benefits would stop, but thats not fair on people with genuine needs. But paying benefits for extra wives in a country where bigamy is a criminal offence just makes me want to learn to play the bagpipes and start killing people.
Duly noted and edited in my 1st post!
 
#16
johnboyzzz said:
You forgot chaingangs. All prisoners will wear bright orange overalls and will work in a chaingang sweeping streets, removing downed trees etc from rivers, cut OAP's grass and do their gardening.
Sounds good, fancy a job as my home secretary :D
 
#18
you will need a minister for 'women's affairs' and I have never tried my hand at being a madame.
 
#19
I personally think im the right man for the post of minister for immigration.
 
#20
johnboyzzz said:
You forgot chaingangs. All prisoners will wear bright orange overalls and will work in a chaingang sweeping streets, removing downed trees etc from rivers, cut OAP's grass and do their gardening.

Trees have down versions too? bloody hell, first people, then tigers, now trees!
 
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