Vote for ARRSE

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by theoriginalphantom, May 3, 2006.

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  1. Floowing a post by OldTimer in another thread, the subject of arrsers forming a sensible new governement was (jokingly) raised.

    So, who fancies being in the the ARRSE party, we'll need a name, slogan, oh and some policies I suppose, but we could do what all the other parties do and steal theirs.

    Which Arrsers should take on which role?

    Perhaps a minister of blame could be created? or a departement of sacrificial goats?

    remember, no serious posts on this one.

    (apologies if its been done before, but I couldn't find anything using 'search')
  2. How about a

    Ministry of Offence
    Department of Affairs
  3. spike7451

    spike7451 RIP

    PTP for Prime Minister.....
    The Guru for Home Sec & Pentwyn for spin!
  4. Honours and Awards transferred to a PPP such as Walt's Medals (Worcester) Ltd.
  5. How about "The party for those whom cannot be Arrsed" for the slogon? Would have added "..with politics" but I think the first version will attract more voters

    edited for mongness, and also to add Ministry of Internal Mong Affairs, not to be confused with the Foreign Mong Office
  6. Oooo, I want Minister for Student Liasons.

    (not Education, just students)

    They won't turn up, and I get to attend student parties, and work my way through the female ones :D
  7. I personally think that we should forget usual demcratic processes and go for the full military junta.
    Lets take Parliment by force and return Her Maj to the real head of state as opposed to a figurehead.
    All current members of the cabinet are beheaded by volunteers drawn from all three services as well as the Police, NHS and anyone who's ever attempted to claim tax credits.

    Lets make the defence secretary an ex-serviceman (or is that a bit to far out there???)
    And the health secretary a doctor

    And when we're all settled then lets execute the welsh!!!!!!
  8. I want first dibs on getting the job of secretary of the Department for Inapropriate Policies, Socially unacceptable Humour and Indiscriminate p1ss Taking.
  9. Hold on SCoy, as a non discriminating minister who is fully aware of his obligations under the Sexual Discrimination Act and the Human Rights Act, won't you have to screw equal numbers of male and female students?
  10. I'll volunteer for Home Affairs Minister or Foreign Affairs Minister. In fact any type of affair, its been that long I'm not fussed.
  11. True, very true. However due to budget constraints, the area of male sh@gging will be outsourced to local councils, lest we appear to be too centralised.

    Elections should also be replaced with It's A Knockout -style contests.:D
  12. Can I suggest a new law whereby people have to have a licence to breed. And I don't mind being the government inspector responsible for dishing out the licences (or more importantly for refusing them!). I'm sure that Arrsers could come up with a suitable set of criteria to allow/disallow you a licence.

    Also I would enjoy refusing a perfectly reasonable request (from fit female citizens), but being open to a gross abuse of my powers by way of sexual bribery in hand chosen cases!
  13. WTF are you saying about my ears??? If I was in the chair, there'd be no foreign kiddy fiddlers running around and I'd second every Provost Sgt as a Prison Governer.

    Vote Guru

    I am uncorruptable, but seeing as I now have a pass for the Corps tent on sat, I would be willing to buy you off. I will be in a dark blue arrse t shirt and matching watchstrap combo...
  14. Ooooh we could pass a law that any woman wishing to leave her husband must fill out a Formal Intent of Seperation To Enable Divorce form..... in tripplicate. That way even after you've been shafted by the courts you'll be able to sit back happy in the knowledge that your ex was fisted at least three times before you were shafted. :lol:
  15. Whats all this ?? I wasn't joking .....