A man with twelve months to live gets a visit from god and is told that he could live a little longer if he gives up drinking, smoking and sex. The man admits that it would be difficult but would try his best and god agrees to visit again in two months time. On his next visit, god asks "How are you getting on"? The man replies "Very well my lord. I've quit the smoking and the drinking but last week the wife bent over to reach into the freezer and I couldn't help but take her up the arse". "They don't approve of that sort of thing in heaven" said the lord. To which the man replied "They aint too keen in Tesco either"