On Tuesday night I found myself slightly drunk and in a hotel in West Wales. In the bar of said hotel it ought to go without saying. Also in the bar was a mlaarer but one of the least affected, we are talking fractions of a chromosone, it could have gone either way. She was sitting alone in the bar, toying with several glasses of white wine. Suddenly I saw a bright light and was seized with the spirit of arrse...when I recovered my senses I found I was sitting opposite her and had apparently purchased a glass of wine. They were out of ice cream and balloons. To protect the innocent we'll call her Tracy, 18 from Liverpool. After all no body would expect me to use the true details! She was of a very fat disposition, had a blonde bob and at least three visible tiny "feminine" tattoos - of dolphins, ladybirds and teddy bears. She was very sad because her boyfriend had brought her with him to Aberystwuth, had then sloped off with his chums and basically abandoned her. Her man friend had only recently taken up with her and was an electrician running a small company. She was his clerk. He had the previous evening deflowered her. She was devestated to be left in this state, not least because she drunkenly confessed she had in fact very much enjoyed the sex and couldn't wait for another go. Well what would you have done? How many tattoos were there on the rest of her body? Are you an ex-Sigs powerman running your own business in the Pool? Are you a)ashamed of yourself yet and b)ever so nasty?