This may seem pertinent. I just think its funny in a way. Years old though.
My Uncle Freddy received the following from one of his former comrades.
I hope this finds you well and your leg is on the mend. You were greatly missed at the last Old and Bold dinner, which turned out to be a most remarkable occasion.
Our table included a female who was still serving.
At first everything seemed pretty congenial then someone asked Tommy Bell about the Norway campaign. You remember Tommy, lost his toes to frostbite at Steinkjer. Well, no sooner had he begun talking about the difficulty of moving on the ground because of snow and ice and German air supremacy, than this lady told him that that was nothing, she’d done an Arctic Warfare course.
She described every detail and it seemed interminable but finally she needed to breathe so Dick and Trevor started to compare notes on their treatment as guests of the Japanese and the Communist Chinese. They mentioned interrogation and Zena the Ice Warrior Princess took the cue, Apparently she had done an interrogation course and was told that it was tougher than the real thing, so we all got our ears chewed off a second time.
Eventually Dick mumbled something about it possibly not being quite the same thing and Trevor was clearly a bit upset so ‘Stinker’ Cartwright tried to defuse the situation by mentioning Arnhem and told his joke about the difficulty of having a crap at the Hartenstein Hotel – the one that ends, ‘I don’t mean my first visit, I’m talking about the trip last year.’ I know it wasn’t even funny the first time but poor old ‘Stinker’ didn’t get as far as the punchline. She rounded on him and told him straight up that women could poo anywhere men could. Not only that, it was no reason to keep women out of the infantry. She offered to poo on the spot if we didn’t believe her – at which point ‘Stinker’ lost his thread and the Beef Wellington lost its appeal.
That should have been the end of it but old Bill Gollings heard ‘women’ in the infantry’ and remarked that, as a veteran of Kohima, he was not in favour. I’m surprised Bill heard anything as he’s been pretty deaf on that side since being hit by that Jap rifle butt. She told him in pretty short order that she’d never heard of Kohima and there was no such thing as hand to hand combat but perhaps he’d heard of Afghanistan and did he have any idea? Poor old Bill tried to explain about the tennis court but she brushed him aside and told him that it couldn’t have been much of a fight if they had time to play tennis. She then offered her opinion that asymetrical warfare was far tougher than any other sort of warfare while Tommy gripped the edge of the table til his knuckles turned white and ‘Stinker’ eyed the butter knife with increasing intensity. Ninety or not, once a Para…
Laurie Styles, you remember Laurie, got the MC on Longstop and should have got another one after Merville, gently suggested that women were possibly not best suited to the intense physical nature of infanteering, and referred to the particular intensity of ‘dig or die’ during the Normandy Campaign. No sooner were the words out of his mouth than he was wishing himself back at the Bois du Mont. Apparently he was a dinosaur and what the **** did he know? I don’t know what’s going on in Afghanistan, though Reg Fisher’s daughter is out there at the moment, but to hear her tell it, it’s a wonder anyone’s still alive.
I tell you Freddy, it didn’t matter what anyone had done, she knew better and had done the course. I’ve not heard such a love of the first person singular since Corporal Rimmer two-shedded everyone all the way from Salerno to the Gothic Line until someone shut him up with an adjustable spanner. Sadly, the dinner was not a REME do.
It was remorseless. Do you remember the time we took on a Tiger and the damn thing rolled on and on wreaking havoc until Corporal Thompson finally got a lucky track shot with the Six Pounder? Well it was just like that, but without Corporal Thompson or the Six Pounder.
All the best and see you next year if the Good Lord spares us.
I sense a story behind that reply.
For those of us not in the know could you please elaborate?
It was on one of the 'Women in the Infantry' threads and Ishtar was in full flow, talking b0llocks. Whatever course you'd been on, she'd done it twice and any practical experience was as nothing to her. She also had a nasty habit of trying to get people banned if they crossed her. @stacker1 took her on and there was a a bit of trauma because they were both serving etc etc and knew each other - stacker is better placed to talk you through the ins and outs of that.
I got a gypsy's warning via PM from Jarrod that Ishtar seemed to have a charmed life on Arrse so I decided to write something that satirised her view but which couldn't get me sanctioned. That's why there are all the references to Arctic Warfare and Interrogation courses and the Old and Bold she belittles are linked to some of the toughest fights of the Second World War - she'd been on all the courses and wasn't backward in telling us about it. The reference to the Bois Du Mont (and Merville) was because I'd just finished reviewing a book on the Merville attack for Arrse.
Happily, soon afterwards, Ishtar was gripped and ceased to trouble us.
I didnt know the lard arsed bint personally, she was basically a bullshitting trout who thought she was special because she was used to living in an Infantry barracks and when there are 100 blokes to 1 woman, its doesnt matter if you are a ugly, fat whale with zero personality and the humour of an extermination camp, some desperate men will pretend you are worth a poke.
I find her stories of fitness/courses to be on par with Bugsy fables. Especially as she did the London marathon in a time so slow that Steven_Seagull said she "moonwalked wearing a suit of armour"
She played the race card, then couldnt back it up, told people she was going to come around the workplace because of what was written on ARRSE, sent me a threatening PM and ruined Nobby_Sappers marriage.
This was one of my efforts to also not name her directly
You might have guessed, I was not her biggest fan.
What's his unit, FMP? From the armband and white-looking holsterI'd guess at RMP or RP? Badge on the beret (and depth of shade on beret) doesn't look like RMP, though, but it's a low-res' image, so...I'm remembering my Dad. He never spoke about it.
He kept a book beside his bed which he'd omitted to return to the Padua Military Library. I picked it up last night and found he'd marked an extract which must have resonated with him in the aftermath of WWII. It's pretty appropriate reading it now.
Below is the text, plus a pic of my Dad in Schio, Veneto and the Red Hackle he got on VE Day 1945 when he did a swap with a Black Watch Major during the celebrations. He gave it to me years ago and told me to stick it in my pocket on Remembrance Day in memory of those who didn't make it home. Dad walked out of school aged 17 to sign up in 1943, finally came home 1948 and was a reservist until 1955. Thanks Dad. Wish I had asked you about it.
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What's his unit, FMP? From the armband and white-looking holsterI'd guess at RMP or RP? Badge on the beret (and depth of shade on beret) doesn't look like RMP, though, but it's a low-res' image, so...
Celebrating the 73rd Anniversary of the independence of India?What are we doing on August the 15th ??
Excellent. Perhaps we should have a VJ 75 thread. The BL have understandably cancelled their plans for overseas visits, so there will again be more emphasis on remembering and celebrating at home.Celebrating the 73rd Anniversary of the independence of India?
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VJ Day never gets the coverage like VE Day, the forgotten Army is forgotten throughout history.
I for one, will be putting the bunting back up, maybe by then, even having some mates round, and raising a glass to those boys who fought on for months after hostilities ceased in Europe.
Just watched the Red Arrows flying over London. Apparently there was no advanced publicity as there were concerns that many would ignore lockdown restrictions and congregate in large numbers around the Thames.
The TV coverage didn’t show any evidence of crowds, but concentrated on the fly past. As ever, it was an awesome sight.