Varying Temperature in the North

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by hammy123, Oct 16, 2008.

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  1. 50 degrees
    Southerners turn on the central heating
    Geordies plant their gardens

    40 degrees
    Southerners shiver uncontrollably
    Geordies sunbathe

    30 degrees
    Southerners cars wont start
    Geordies drive with the windows open

    20 degrees
    Southerners wear coats, gloves and woolly hats
    Geordies throw on a t short, girls start wearing mini skirts

    10 degrees
    Southerners begin to evacuate
    Geordies go swimming in the North Sea

    0 degrees
    Southern landlords turn up the heating
    Geordies have the last BBQ before it turns cold

    -10 degrees
    Southerners continue to evacuate
    Geordies wear a hat

    -50 degrees
    Santa abandons the North Pole
    Geordies put the heating on

    -173 degrees
    Alcohol freezes
    Geordies complain that the pubs have closed

    -297 degrees
    Microbiological life begins to disappear
    The cows on the Newcastle town moor complain that the vets hands are cold

    -460 degrees
    All atomic motion stops
    Geordies stamp their feet and blow on their hands

    -500 degrees
    Hell freezes over
    Sunderland qualify for Europe
  2. I see you haven't made the transition from Fahrenheit yet.
  3. 2009 - geordies get relegated from the premiership. everyone else laughs!
  4. And Kevin Keegan becomes a tactially sound football manager.
  5. Ord_Sgt

    Ord_Sgt RIP

    You mean people actually live in the North. 8O
  6. If by live you mean go about our daily business without fear of being stabbed by a drugged up, chav mong then yes, of course.

    Or did you mean live as in being able to travel hither and thither without spending 25 hrs stuck in traffic or penned into public transport like cattle on the way to slaughter?

    Or did you mean live as in the ability to do anything without being a self-obsessed bunch of cnuts who's self worth is measured in overpriced, unnecessary, poorly produced 'designer' goods?
  7. and Murphy learns to spell the word: "tactically"
  8. :D :D :D :D :D :D
  9. Ord_Sgt

    Ord_Sgt RIP

    Keep your hair on, it is the naafi you know. :D London stinks as much as Newcastle anyway. :wink:
  10. i do apologise, seem to be a bit bitey today :oops:

    southerners are all cnuts though
  11. By North do you mean South? :x

    Edited to add - You are all soft English poovders :twisted:
  12. Anything north of Bethnal Green is Scotland anything south of the Isle of Dogs is France.

    Geordies are just Scotsmen with their heads kicked in.
  13. Your spelling is appalling - its Befnall Green 8)
  14. Nearly it's actually Befnaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall Green
  15. Underneath the arches, Down Paradise Row