USMC funny

#1
I didn't know where to put this mail from a USMC mate of mine... anyhoo.

"Shared by -911: You can't make this stuff up

Two Texas Highway Patrol Officers were conducting speeding enforcement on Hwy 77, just south of Kingsvill , Texas


One of the officers was using a hand held radar device to check speeding vehicles approaching the town of Kingsville . The officers were suddenly surprised when the radar gun began reading 300 miles per hour and climbing.

The officer attempted to reset the radar gun, but it would not reset and then it suddenly turned off.

Just then a deafening roar over the Mesquite treetops on Hwy 77 revealed that the radar had in fact locked on to a USMC F/A-18 Hornet which was engaged in a low flying exercise near this, it's Naval Air home base location in Kingsville.

Back at the Texas Highway Patrol Headquarters in Corpus Christi the Patrol Captain fired off a complaint to the US Naval Base Commander in Kingsville for shutting down his equipment.

The reply came back in true USMC style:

'Thank you for your letter....

You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Hornet had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked on to, your hostile radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it, which is why it shut down.

Furthermore, an Air-to-Ground missile aboard the fully armed aircraft had also automatically locked on to your equipment's location.

Fortunately, the Marine Pilot flying the Hornet recognized the situation for what it was, quickly responded to the missile system alert status and was able to override the automated defense system before the missile was launched to destroy the hostile radar position on the side of Hwy 77 So. of Kingsville.

The pilot suggests you cover your mouths when cussing at them, since the video systems on these jets are very high tech.

Sergeant Johnson, the officer holding the radar gun, should get his dentist to check his left rear molar. It appears the filling is loose. Also, the snap is broken on his holster.'

Semper Fi"
 
#4
Yawn
 
#5
****ing Yanks, this was a Eurofighter that was clocked by Police in Fife (?), the RAF replied, not the USMC.
 
Z

Zarathustra

Guest
#8
I've seen the exact same post, but it was in the UK and it was the RAF not USMC. Similar to the one about oil rig workers/police/firemen/paramedics/steel workers/soldiers/marines/air traffic controllers* getting regular drugs tests when people claiming benefits don't get tested.


*Delete as applicable
 
Q

quick-morser

Guest
#16
The orderly sgt was doing the rounds of the singlies block and found three of the lads shagging a girl who was face down on the bed.
He dropped his trousers and joined in until she turned round and it was his daughter.

Its true, my mate told me
 
#17
Has Lucy Lawless ever got her tits out?
 
#18
#19
Didn't this also happen in the Falklands, and somewhere else as featured in soldier mag? You would thing the speed gun manufacturers would do something about this....
 
E

exmunkey

Guest
#20
I enjoyed that story till you lot ruined it for me, still still got Christmas to look forward to
 
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