Up to my nuts in fat birds Again!!

#1
I have been resisting shagging fat birds for about two years now, until last week, there she was all of 20 stone of her, she was on my case she was quite good looking for a fatty, huge tits, long hair, scots.......come up to my hotel room she says, bars closing, i have a nice bottle of wine chilling...she says, i wandered out of her hotel room about 0530hrs after giving her a good seeing to.

Trouble is i cant keep my eyes or hands the fat ones now.... I am addicted to shagging fat birds, are there any organisations to help, if not are there any "members" with the same problem 8O
 

Biped

LE
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#2
Achmed said:
I have been resisting shagging fat birds for about two years now, until last week, there she was all of 20 stone of her, she was on my case she was quite good looking for a fatty, huge tits, long hair, scots.......come up to my hotel room she says, bars closing, i have a nice bottle of wine chilling...she says, i wandered out of her hotel room about 0530hrs after giving her a good seeing to.

Trouble is i cant keep my eyes or hands the fat ones now.... I am addicted to shagging fat birds, are there any organisations to help, if not are there any "members" with the same problem 8O
Every time I see a fat bint, I give her a surrepticious BO sniff, and then calculate how easy it would be to 'get in there'. It's a mental sport, but I don't know how far I am from turning it into a physical one.

I've had a few fat bints before, and they are as keen as mustard for sex, which I am too (anything with a pulse), whereas your thin model-types tend to keep you waiting and play your desperation to get things like MARRIAGE, HOUSE, CAR, MONEY, DEATH OR DIVORCE.

Should I seek help?
 
#3
Nowt wronf with a fat bird, just don't let your mates see her.......................................or video it all and put it of a BBW site
 
#6
how very true. Theyre a bit grabby though, they bombard you with texts, phone calls, I even had a pie fancier turn up at my door a few days after. But I threw a lb of ham out into the street and she scurried off.
 
#7
Achmed said:
I have been resisting shagging fat birds for about two years now, until last week, there she was all of 20 stone of her, she was on my case she was quite good looking for a fatty, huge tits, long hair, scots.......come up to my hotel room she says, bars closing, i have a nice bottle of wine chilling...she says, i wandered out of her hotel room about 0530hrs after giving her a good seeing to.
:cry: You promised you wouldn't mention our liaison Achmed. :twisted:

Seriously though 20 stone is a big, big girl. Glad you lived to tell the tale.
 
#8
Achmed said:
Trouble is i cant keep my eyes or hands the fat ones now.... I am addicted to shagging fat birds, are there any organisations to help

Weight watchers???

although, actually, it could be a rather good trapping ground... (pops off to WW site to find local meeting)
 
#9
The best ones to get are the ones who think they're overweight and therefore unattractive, when in reality, they're actually quite attractive.

This way, you get to have some of the pros of the fat bird (grateful for sex and attention, thinks you're great etc.) but none of the cons (oxygen deprivation, crumbs forced into your body etc.).

It's a win-win situation! :lol:
 
#10
labrat said:
Achmed said:
Trouble is i cant keep my eyes or hands the fat ones now.... I am addicted to shagging fat birds, are there any organisations to help

Weight watchers???

although, actually, it could be a rather good trapping ground... (pops off to WW site to find local meeting)
slimmers world's what you need...younger clientele 8O
 
#11
Mrs Taz makes a point of telling all her male work collegues who have been 'Dear John'd' to go out and shag a fat bird (and no, she's not fat herself) to restore some sense of self - worth. Apparently works a treat.

Mind you, it was my fault - i'd had a bit of a relationship drama while on pre-tour training. Went out and shagged the largest bird I could find in Bonkers Nightclub in Folkestone. Realised that I had fully hit rock bottom and the only way was up.

Once i'd scrubbed the smell of minge off my face, the world seemed much rosier. Just worked my way up from progressively less fat birds until I met the svelte Mrs.Taz.
 
#12
I dream of getting a fat bird....or any bird for that matter. I miss bedding the mingers no-one else would...sigh! Damn this growing up lark
 
#13
mac5543 said:
I dream of getting a fat bird....or any bird for that matter. I miss bedding the mingers no-one else would...sigh! Damn this growing up lark
That sounds sad Mac. You're not after a sympathy shag are you? :twisted: :p
 
#14
labrat said:
Achmed said:
Trouble is i cant keep my eyes or hands the fat ones now.... I am addicted to shagging fat birds, are there any organisations to help

Weight watchers???

although, actually, it could be a rather good trapping ground... (pops off to WW site to find local meeting)
good plan, low self esteem as well. Dont go in eating a big mac though.
 
#15
No matter how hard I try to pull the fat bird, I always end up with her good looking skiny mate who's never done anal, but will give it a go 'just this once' to see if she likes it or not!

It's a tuff cross to bear...
 
#17
Airfix said:
No matter how hard I try to pull the fat bird, I always end up with her good looking skiny mate who's never done anal, but will give it a go 'just this once' to see if she likes it or not!

It's a tuff cross to bear...
And when I click my fingers, you will wake from your dreamlike sleep..... :D
 
#18
Achmed said:
I have been resisting shagging fat birds for about two years now, until last week, there she was all of 20 stone of her, she was on my case she was quite good looking for a fatty, huge tits, long hair, scots.......come up to my hotel room she says, bars closing, i have a nice bottle of wine chilling...she says, i wandered out of her hotel room about 0530hrs after giving her a good seeing to.

Trouble is i cant keep my eyes or hands the fat ones now.... I am addicted to shagging fat birds, are there any organisations to help, if not are there any "members" with the same problem 8O
You're nothing but a pervert, man.

Shagging fat birds is like crawling through cowshit on a field exercise. Sometimes you just have to grit your teeth and do it, but you're not supposed to enjoy it!
 
#19
Wishful_Thinking said:
Airfix said:
No matter how hard I try to pull the fat bird, I always end up with her good looking skiny mate who's never done anal, but will give it a go 'just this once' to see if she likes it or not!

It's a tuff cross to bear...
And when I click my fingers, you will wake from your dreamlike sleep..... :D
I'd offer you out for a slur like that..... But I'm busy introducing a skiny bird to the joys of biting down on a pillow! :roll:
 
#20
Airfix said:
Wishful_Thinking said:
Airfix said:
No matter how hard I try to pull the fat bird, I always end up with her good looking skiny mate who's never done anal, but will give it a go 'just this once' to see if she likes it or not!

It's a tuff cross to bear...
And when I click my fingers, you will wake from your dreamlike sleep..... :D
I'd offer you out for a slur like that..... But I'm busy introducing a skiny bird to the joys of biting down on a pillow! :roll:
Is she trying to stop herself from laughing?
 

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