Unwritten Rules and Expectations of Being a Soldier

Now I've done a wee bit I have noticed that there are things that are just done in the Army that you would struggle to get away with in civvy street.

I'll go first with this offering.

When you lend kit/equipment etc to a mucker, it can be years before you get it back. The thing being, you always have to ask for it back. The longer you leave it, the more embarrassed you feel to ask for it back, until it comes to the point where the borrower is convinced that it's their own piece of kit, and your last four that's stamped all over it is 'pure coincidence'.

As for mountain bikes, a soldier can easily expect upwards of 5 bikes to get nicked throughout a career.

 

Bum sex with fellow collegues.

 

Of course, the parachuting fraternity can take this to another level!!

(I hear that 3 Para mortars are all banned from kennels and stables).

 

Stained bedding issues. never happens at the four seasons
I was late for work for the first time last week (5 minutes) and everyone just smiled and took no notice. I never got rifted off to the nearest cell being told I was sha55ing idle or anything

 

Falshirmjager is right, suggesting butt rape to a civilian coleague causes temper loss..... saying to a squaddie won't raise an eyebrow, just a 'yeah if yoru quick' or a 'twos up on your mum / daughter / gran / dad' in return

 

Try taking a sports afternoon on a wednesday without putting leave in.

that gets some funny looks from the rest of the office.

also farting loudly and claiming it, goes down a treat too!!

 

As a soldier you can kill women and children if your life or a collegues life is threatened.

Try that as a civvie and the whole country is up in arms.

Look what happened to that poor lad Ian Huntley.

 

yeah

ask a civvi colleague to 'nosh you off' and see what happens

flashback to 2 Para Mortars in the Shot '92


Oh I miss the 5s Bar

 

I think others own more of my kit than I do. Just the 4 bikes (dustman took my rusty old Raleigh) though so I'm feeling good about that plus I've swiped a couple myself so no grumbles here.

 

lagging up your mate's leg in the bar...

oh the memories ...

 

I think i have the jist of this now

its the naafi afterall

So here goes
Expecting your civvie mates or workmates to all be sick in an ice bucket and then take turns in empying the bucket by taking swigs without throwing up again. i first did this on a tour to Berlin in the RMP bar, under the clock i seem to remember.

i did try this when i left the nest and was out with some so called hardend rugby lads, they just looked sadly at me as i got escorted out of Edwards.

happy days.

 

In civvie street I never heard 'Lend's yer woif'.

 

people at work tend to look down on you when you mention that you swamped last night,

 

I don't think a friendly game of 'freckles' goes down as well in Debenhams staff canteen, as it does in a Catterick NAAFI.

 

.... then better not mention swamping on the missus....