Unwanted phone calls

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by skid2, Oct 10, 2011.

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  1. skid2

    skid2 LE Book Reviewer

    Warning. I have been informed that this computer contains a virus and has been infected.

    While in Ms Skids house I have just taken a a call on the landline to inform me that my computer has been infected by a virus. The only problem is the person he wishes to inform of this does not exist and has never existed.

    Having been told by an old friend that the police have been round to his place to let him know there was a complaint made to them about his use of racist and abusive language when he recived a similar call. 'Fuck off Ghandi and don't ring this number again' may not be the best response.
    I put him on hold.
    These calls seem to be on the increase. I even get them on the landline at home despite the number not being listed. Quite frankly it is a pain in the backside
    How does one proceed?
  2. Just hang up on them or stick to an old fashioned 'fuck off!' which without a Paki on the end should be fine :).
  3. Make sure you have a serviceable policeman's whistle by the phone at all times. Give the brute a blast with it should he make further nuisance calls.
    • Like Like x 2
  4. Just say hold the line whilst you get the home owner and leave the twat waiting for a while, normally when I check back after 30 minutes theres no one there. Theres companies like TPS that you can sign onto but wont get rid of morons like that.........Ive tried these things when the mother in law phones but she keeps calling back.
  5. Talk to them in a muffled tone so they cannot here what you are saying,or talk to them in a made up foreign language.If they ask you to go to a website in order to check what virus you have just put them on hold,after several phone calls from these cold callers I have never heard off them since......
  6. Wordsmith

    Wordsmith LE Book Reviewer

    I personally silently place the phone on a cushion and go about my business, letting the caller burble away into thin air. They may waste their time talking to no-one in particular for as long as they wish. And I have the additional satisfaction that they're running up an interesting phone bill if calling from overseas.

  7. I spend hours on the phone chatting to them.

    I don't have any real friends.
    • Like Like x 8
  8. Sign in to the B.T. telephone preference service.

    They can set you up , so that on receiving said call, a couple of number taps will filter that number out of the way (up to 20 numbers) then they get replaced as you add more.
    It is free for the first month, so take that on and on the last day, cancel the service, then sign up again for another month (I have done it myself.
    Oh, this particular service effectively blocks a number even if they have withheld their number.

    I even blocked one of my sons when he came up with a new phone,

    good luck
  9. As long as you weren't a Tech or B mech I will be your friend.
    • Like Like x 1
  10. They call here too. Apoo rings me up one fine Sunday to tell me that my computer has a virus. "Oh really how did that happen?" Apparently it's in my operating system. "How do you know this?" We scanned your computer. "That's nice and what operating system am I using?" Apparently I'm using Vista. "BRAAP FAIL COCKHEAD! SEE YA."

    No more calls since. :)
  11. Go here, it's free:

  12. Have some fun with them using the following advice from Sean Lock:

    1. in a polite manner explain that the person is upstairs and you will just go and get them.
    2. scream in your angriest parade square voice:


    3.politley explain that he/she is just taking her shoes off and that your sorry to keep them waiting.

    If they wait through that then make noises like you are killing someone and then, again politely, explain that you will have to hang up as the person has fell downstairs again and requires an ambulance...

    He's a genius Sean Lock.
    • Like Like x 1
  13. Why are you swearing at me? ;-)
  14. You just have to say that you are not interested and I won't call again.
  15. My neighbour is like that with Jehovah's Witnesses. Keeps them on the doorstep for ages; they leave looking in a state of shock, twitching, with wide open staring eyes.