Unintended Consequences

"The "law of unintended consequences" (also called the "law of unforeseen consequences") states that any purposeful action will produce some unintended consequences. A classic example is a bypass — a road built to relieve traffic congestion on a congested road — that attracts new development and with it more traffic, resulting in two congested streets instead of one."

The Army know all about this and do it really well, (of course, this is just an excuse to tell a few stories); here are a couple............

On a smoker while adventure training in Germany, two Jocks got into a dust up and were chased down the road and accross the field by the local police. Confident they were getting away they scaled a couple of fences only to run into the arms of more police. After a stay in East Germany and some time with the RMP they spent a short time in Colchester before resuming their civillian lives. (1979-80)


The officer OC St Kilda, drove up to the helipad in his land rover to watch the chopper deliver supplies. It was very windy so he stayed in his Lany with the heaters blowing full blast. The chopper came in with the load underslung, it being too windy to land and the crew dropped the load. Unfortunately, a frozen chicken burst out and went bouncing down the hill toward the Lany like one of Barnes Wallis's best. Smashing through the window it hit the officer in the shoulder which tragically resulted in a medical discharge due to being hit by a frozen chicken. (mid 80's)

Any more...................?
I'm just thrilled that this thread is destined to be the least popular ever so before I go to the bottom of the garden to eat worms I'll add another tale and then consign it to the ARRSE vault of "threads nobody is really interested in."

Cush, a junior NCO of previously questionable character decided one evening, in the best traditions of his fine regiment, to make a stand against the local poleizi, with the words, "come on then, I'll take you all," which sounded on the night something like, "comeonthenyafvckinggleekitbvstrdsIlllhayaallyafvckingmuppets." You'll be pleased to know that Cush made a full recovery from the German shepherd bite wounds on his legs in the jail.
Bumper said:
I go to the bottom of the garden to eat worms.
Please post some photos of the event. If you're planning on cooking them first perhaps a thread in the cookery section with recipes would be in order.

Most of the stories you mention are probably in the 'Army Myths' thread already. Good stuff though.
Had an unbelievable experience while on Duty as guardcommander at Westminster barracks Minden in october 1966, The camp gates were locked at 2200hrs curfew, 2 jockinese cooks were still out on the town , atiny glaswegian by the name of Jocky Robinson and a huge hulk of a highlander called Andy Notman shortly after midnight there was a commotion at the gates, Andy and young robby were arguing about the best way to get back into camp , robby suggested ramming thegates , upon which andy picked him up and tucked him under his arm, with Robbo headfirst andy charged the Iron gates, claret everywhere!! when we stopped laughing we realised they were going to try again 8O tolate robbies head was used as a battering ram again , this time becoming wedged between the bars of the gate, robby spent 3 weeks in Rinteln , andy was promoted full corporal and their ways never crossed again, I met Robby purely by chance propping up the bar in the swan pub at frimley a few years back , as far as I know he is still going strong!!

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