out of interest, how are your wife and kids feeling in their new regimental life? are they settled in school and happy?, is your wife employed/gainfully occupied eg being a mum? is their family and friends in the area and life outside the army? do you get involved in regtl/coy parties/sports/events? are you wasting energy fighting the system rather than relaxing and going with the flow?I must say gents a humbled by your response, I thought I would give arrse ago as you all have been there and done it. I know I sound a bit silly for a 32 year old man or a bit soft. I've always Delt with my own demons and issue by myself what's hasn't helped.
I will genuinely give the writing down of my thoughts a go,luckily enough my chain of command and my Sargent noticed I was low and got me on too mental health after crimbo and luckily kept quite from my troop. You are the first people I have asked for advice so I appreciate all of your input and advice. As I am awaiting my appointment with them this week.
So thank you for you time gents from rambling husband and father.
- whilst you're navel gazing it may be the case that your family are actually quite content with their lot! someone else said speak to your wife lots - i concur! and at the same time take the time to speak to your kids and do family things etc
- i suspect being a nig your wages will be low which always adds pressure but thats the sort of the thing we all suffered at first, you just need to manage it as best as you can and your finances will improve with experience, quantification and promotion and also when you are away on scheme or ops
Lastly, I'm a life long singly who did 28 years so what do I know about marriage and kids? the answer is flip your experience on its head and consider the sad f**k that is me with no significant other or kids! I am actually jealous that Ill never have what you've got so remember that when you're down!
PS good luck - my first 6 months at my first unit in 1989 in Germany were hard because I was the section nig and was always getting 'crated' for honest mistakes or just 'because' but eventually I was accepted and never looked back! my trade and badge meant I moved units every 2-3 years and that was refreshing and invigorating