ULTIMATE FARCE

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by CGS, Sep 17, 2002.

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  1. CGS

    CGS War Hero Moderator

    You'll never guess what I have just seen on the Idiot's Lantern...

    Some comedy about the Special Arrse Service!

    Or something...
     
  2. What a pity I missed it. ;)
     
  3. woopert

    woopert LE Moderator

    Well you can catch the 2nd episode on Wednesday at 9pm, ITV.

    It was worth a laugh, especially when the horrified police officer was walking round looking at the carnage with the CO (AKA Col Dan Fortune from Soldier Soldier..Type cast par chance?). Passing one of the bidies with it's skull blown off, the copper gives Soldier B grief and the CO says "is he yours?" Soldier B replies "yes sir, and 'im in the stairwell an' all" "Hmmmm...Greedy!" says our wafty-haired boss-man.  ;D Classic!

    The plot was thin (who would send the SAS in to break up a bank siege when it is less than 24 hours old?? and box only seemed capable of dropping in one mike and a CCTV camera), but hey, quality entertainment. Good to see Chris Ryan has finally done something useful with his life (bit part player).  :D

    Of course if you want to see some decent espionage, watch the Bourne Identity, much better.
     
  4. I want to join, would there be any room for me?
     
  5. I think this was actually very realistic, in particular the training aspects. For instance, it shows the favourable results of some specialised training and testing methods;

    - How to cook a three course meal (with wine) for about a dozen blokes in a combat situation; ten marks are deducted for every random shotgun shell found in the soup.
    - How to covertly board a helicopter, by using slightly longer than normal grass in the midle of a housing estate as concealment.
    - How to pinch the RAF's hotel rooms for the night without them noticing (although as most SAS troops are not well trained enough to find the sheets in the cupboard, they are permitted to wear body armour to bed to stop them getting chilly).
    - And for the highly skilled operator only, the more trusted members are allowed to stick pins in pretty pictures of buildings. Although until a series of exhaustive safety and competency tests are passed, candidates must train with PVA glue in case they prick themselves.

    At all times, a pair of furry mittens are tied to the troops sleeves so they don't forget where they are.
     
  6. I'll be waiting with baited breath for it to come out on BFPS1.
     
  7. Isn't it classic TV romanticism to think that every special forces chap looks like Ross Kemp?  

    PS Woo... I had no idea you were such a Soldier Soldier officianado.....!
     
  8. woopert

    woopert LE Moderator

    Only the first series, it went crap after that. Although, I did appear as an extra on a couple of occaisions. Any excuse to wear my mess-kit on tv!

    I didn't see last week's installment, so maybe it has happened already, but I wish Sgt Matey or whatever the Mitchell Boy's new character is called would just get on and shag the Int Burd, coz it's only the prospect of that happening that keeps me in any way interested. I almost thought it was quids-in when he called round in the middle of the night and she was in her dressing gown and bugger-all else. The least she could do was let him open it all the way and give the lads a peek  :eek:
     
  9. Noo - it got better after that - better totty anyway (Major Voce and the very sexy Serg MacCleod).  Plus one of the COs was yummy - he started bonking the medical officer, Sadie.  Those three beat Robson and Jermome hands down..
     
  10. Stop teasing with all this quality TV while I’m stuck with reruns of corrie and doggy porn made by the Ops Rm signaller.

    No pte X I haven’t seen the videotape, where did you leave it?
     
  11. Just watched tonight's episode.

    Call me old fashioned, but I thought u called in CONTACT at the earliest possible.

    Not after the bad guys had legged it from the scene effectively.

    Didn't she shoot a lot of bullets out of that one mag... Belt fed H&K. I had one of those "Sons of Katie Elder" gunfight flashbacks..

    and if Gwant was really a Sasser, how long would it take him to get slotted? I mean, he stands out like bulldogs' bollies.

    Whole thing's going downhill, maybe the series finale will be better?
     
  12. woopert

    woopert LE Moderator

    I thought the fire-fight at the check point was a bit A Team-esque...... millions of rounds expended at 3 feet range, yet no bugger hit! At one stage I thought a car would roll over and 3 guys would get out shaking their heads while BA Gwant was shouting "I'll get you Murdoch...FOOL!"
     
  13. I liked the commendable restraint shown by the squadie on the checkpoint....2 rounds engaging a target already in the South..... 5.56 hot pursuit...

    "How badly do you want your commission?"
    Surely he meant...
    "Hope that's not Para Regiment on the VCP"

    ....and where was the "dob a terrorist" phone number on the side of the Wolf?....

    Bit more research and a more believable main character methinks.

    Or is this yet another "doco-recruitment prgramme?"

    Sod it, gonna phone me mate on the First Tuesday team, and tell him he's long overdue to make that "The making of a STAB" programme he was threatening before SDR.
     
  14. I thought that had already been done with "All Quiet on the Preston Front"? ;D
     
  15. ooooooooooo I was in that!
    .....and a few other maties.....

    We were the "background squaddies playing pool and drifiting around the place looking military"

    Missed me chance in "Saving Private Ryan" but look forward to any other opportunities to show me best side

    ......Luvvie........ ;D