UK Border Agency - You couldn't make it up

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by BanjoBill, Dec 19, 2012.

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  1. To be fair, if you make a silly tweet at that airport you're getting nicked.

    So it is pretty safe then.
  2. "Despite this warning, they opened the crates and partially removed some of the explosive devices from their protective packaging while ten people were there.
    This entailed removing three separate layers of packaging, including opening the protective tubing and exposing live rounds of anti-tank ammunition. There were five crates, each containing five rounds.
    The HSE investigation found that UKBA had failed to carry out a suitable risk assessment to enable them to complete the checks safely. Had they done so, they would have recognised several problems.

    "There was a significant risk that the ammunition could detonate if it was dropped"

    Shite type bollocks non-story..bit like HSE saying sometime ago it 'was dangerous to be a soldier' or words to that effect(perhaps someone remebers the actual qoute)
  3. I wonder who's head will roll for that one?

    What were they hoping to find in the box of explosives?

    Sent from my GT-I9100 using ARRSE mobile app
  4. A lickle afghan/somali baby smuggling himself into a better lifre.. :)
  5. Blimey, only took them three years to come to the conclusion it was a bloody stupid thing to do.

    So they get a proverbial slap on the back of the legs whereas anyone else would get a criminal record.
  6. Nothing wrong with the UKBA, excellent record and they give a decent Crimbo Party.

    Attached Files:

  7. Apparently they became very suspicious and insisted on searching the ammunition after the pilot ran across the runway with his fingers in his ears screaming take cover!
  8. For some reason I'm reminded of those old public safety films where they showed some halfwit lighting a fag whilst phoning in a report of a gas leak.
    • Like Like x 1
  9. The visions of stupidity crossing my mind when I read this one are countless and very colourful.

    Flash, brash pilot with large tash and equally large grin slapping the Border Bod (The Twenty Minuter) on the back and saying. "I say old chap, I wouldn't do that."

    Whilst in the background Baldrick recites his most famous poem.

    boom boom boom boom
    boom boom boom

    boom boom boom boom
    boom boom boom
  10. What were they hoping to find in the box of explosives?

    I have seen squaddies fill up use their KIA mates' MFO box with fags. I have been on plunders were the barrels of AS90s were full of whiskey bottles. The ingenuity of the British Squaddie to smuggle good back to the UK knows no bounds.

    Having said that, I can easily imagine the officers saying "search that? you must be having a laugh!" but being told by managers who have no clue about things to get on with it.
  11. Or just be blatant about it, get your mates to pack your MFO and if caught deny all knowledge and claim brain fade.

    Sent via Tapatalk with addictive texting.
  12. Surely the odd carton of fags is a matter for HMRC and part of the age old game. UKBA would be looking for illegal immigrants wouldn't they?

    I doubt we have reverted to smuggling babies hidden in HESH bins.
  13. Regardless of the possibility of smuggling, explosive safety takes paramount on these occasions. These munitions should only have been opened and examined in the oppropriate environment, by the appropriate person - ATO, Nottingham Tp is less than an hours drive from Robin Hood Airport and there's a team on duty 24 hrs a day.

    This is professional arrogance at its worst, some ******** at the airport thinking they're more important than they are.
    • Like Like x 5
  14. I suspect you are half right. Professional arrogance and totally unaware of the potential consequences.

    My brother in law did a spell doing the security searches in airports. The training was minimal and pay and conditions hardly designed to keep anything other than pond life employed. He left PDQ.