Two Friday Jokes!

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Goatman, Dec 16, 2005.

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  1. Goatman

    Goatman LE Book Reviewer

    Joke 1
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    MEN NEVER LISTEN....................

    On a flight to Singapore, a gentleman had made several attempts to get into the men's restroom, but it had always been occupied. The flight attendant noticed his predicament. Sir, she said, " You may use the ladies room if you promise not to touch any of the buttons on the wall."

    He did what he needed to, and as he sat there he noticed the buttons he had promised not to touch. Each button was identified by letters: WW, WA,, PP, and a red one labeled ATR. Who would know if he touched them?

    He couldn't resist. He pushed WW. Warm water was sprayed gently upon his bottom. What a nice feeling, he thought. Men's restrooms don't have nice things like this.

    Anticipating greater pleasure, he pushed the WA button. Warm air replaced the warm water, gently drying his underside.

    When this stopped, he pushed the PP button. A large powder puff caressed his bottom adding a fragile scent of spring flowers to this unbelievable pleasure. The ladies restroom was more than a restroom, it is tender loving pleasure. When the powder puff completed its pleasure, he couldn't wait to push the ATR button which he knew
    would be supreme ecstasy.

    Next thing he knew he was in a hospital. As he opened his eyes, a nurse was staring down at him with a smirk on her face.

    "What happened?" he exclaimed.
    "You pushed one too many buttons," replied the nurse.

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    "The last button marked ATR was an Automatic Tampon
    Remover.

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    " Your balls are in the bucket under the bed " :lol:

    Joke 2 ( fluffy)
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    > > >The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an Urgent problem with one of the main computers, dialed the
    employee's home Phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper.
    "Hello."
    "Is your daddy home?" he asked.
    "Yes," whispered the small voice.
    "May I talk with him?"
    The child whispered, "No."

    Surprised, and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is you're Mommy there?"
    "Yes."
    "May I talk with her?"
    Again the small voice whispered, "No."

    Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss Asked, "Is anybody else there?"
    "Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."

    Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, theboss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"

    "No, he's busy", whispered the child.
    "Busy doing what?"

    "Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered
    >answer.

    Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a Helicopter through the earpiece on the phone the boss asked, "What
    is that noise?"

    "A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice.

    "What is going on there?" asked the boss, now truly alarmed.

    In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."

    Alarmed, concerned, and even more then just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"

    Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle:





    "ME !"

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    Bonne weekend Tous ! :lol:

    Le Chevre