Twas the week before Christmas...

Discussion in 'Int Corps' started by Howayman, Dec 14, 2009.

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  1. I note with interest that the UK media appears to be in a blind panic that there may be snow this week, and there may not be enough salt for the road systems. Should come as no surprise really as UK councils have had exactly one year in which to plan for this, and that they regularly forget that the chances of increased snow fall do occur in winter...cretins.

    Still, I for one will await the first snow flake to fall on the country, and watch as the country comes to a grinding halt, during which time, Postal, Underground and BA workers will all decide to down tools and fcuk off as well.

    Taking all of the above into account it can only be deduced that Christmas is now upon us (yes I know, I should’ve joined some Int Org…)

    Various Rodneys to Oiks Mess' have either gone or are happening now as we speak. Ours was ok but held in the smallest Mess Bar, with the largest number of attendees. Unfortunately, there was no violence on either side (not even a decent chest poking), though there were a number of sore heads the next morning. Which leads me to…

    2 weeks leave, thank god.

    Which actually means that I'll be dragged from shop to shop, with kids probably in tow as well. Outlaws drinking the finest wines from the cellar, while presenting sub-standard plonk to replace it. Cooking for 10 people (some of whom will not be able to stay out of the kitchen and will either offer to help (no thanks) or will stand there, drinking said finest wines and Champagne with pursed lips muttering that they ‘wouldn’t do it like that’. This all occurring while Channel 4 plays another Top Fifty pointless lists and Noel Edmonds does some cringe worthy exploits for Chariddeee.

    So what’s everyone else’s plans / worst fears / gossip from x-change drinks etc?
  2. I thought it was going to be another posts ref the infamous shiite Santa and the squaddie poem.

    How disappointing ;)
  3. My boss is off with swine flu... I have just had a two hour lunch break in the pub... Im quite liking Christmas....
  4. Speaking from the periphery of something euphemistically called "UK Operations" I have it on very good authority (a B2 source) that the local authorities throughout the West Midlands have a fairly hefty salt mountain, so the M5/M6/M42 snarl up will not be due to lack of gritting.

    As for the rest of your post canny lad, seeing as you defenders of the country* are all absent from the 18th until (at the earliest) the 4th of January why didn't you save a few pennies and fuck off somewhere warm instead of whinging.

    * Of course all personnel on duty or on Ops are exempt from this statement, and I wish you a very quiet Christmas and a Peaceful New Year.
  5. It is now Monday. C Minus 12 and counting. Sgts to Offrs tomorrow afternoon, (must get second best drinking liver in tonight). In the office Wednesday morning followed by "sports" afternoon, rucking and mauling through the bloody Metrocentre. Group lunch on Thursday (paid for out of the fund!!!!!!) followed by the annual stagger around Richmond market place. My birthday on Friday.

    Thats just this week. Next week I am decorating the lounge before the "guests" arrive for the festive season.
  6. well have both set of inlaws for christmas (her rents split years ago) so double the shit to deal with!
    i keep thinking to myself i must not get to drunk xmas eve.....but my inner monolog is never working once i had a few beers.

    and her old man will be telling me im doing everything wrong and will take over (well he normally does any way) which is my cue to make drinks look pretty and take all the glory for his hard work (tosser shouldnt butt in!) and then get evils all day long cause he doesnt get thanked

    and then it will be time for crap board games where my trusted dog all of a sudden needs an 8 mile hike which no one will come with me cause its too cold and there too lazy. god i love that dog at times (normally when the misses aint in :) )

    and boxing day it happens all again cause the other inlaw turns up with 2 ungreatfull brats i just want to punch and tell them to grow up (cant there girls) and put up with the over fussing mum who will be like a little jack russel, small pointless yappie little bitch! getting under my feet and wont **** off and get drunk like every one else will do. then ill say something the stepdad wont like about the girls to my delight and the misses upset :)

    and when its all over time to give me muckers a call and for the real party to start!
    merry blaady xmas one and all
  7. Where you going? God I miss Richmond. Used to have a good drink in the Buck Inn before heading off to the Unicorn, Fleece and Turf.
  8. Thats about the route buddy! Starting at 'Spoons I think, then it should all get a bit blurry! I do hope so :lol:
  9. Off to the Cotswolds to let some other poor sod cook, clean and make the bed over xmas. Cost a fortune but would not have it any other way. Mrs PMU gets a rest and is a very happy camper. Best of all it gives a two-word answer to all the free-loaders who hope to come round and polish off my wine-cellar...."Going Away!"

    Horse Doobries and Champers Xmas Eve, Full English for Xmas Brekkie, then a seven courser for lunch with cold collations for the evening. Booze by the bucket load. Full English again for Boxing Day, then a nice pub lunch on the way back to Chez Pronto!

    Merry Xmas to all you buggers and to those of you on duty, be safe.

    Post 900! WooHoo!
  10. I will be "at home" if anyone wants me over Christmas. Can't come soon enough as I am sure a CC1 email has gone round with my name and the subject line " The person to call if you have a fukkin stupid question to ask-especially one that could be answered by actually looking at Part 1 Orders".

  11. Well, apparently it snowed in Hanoi a few days ago, but here in the Delta the weather is hot and humid. The rainy season is all but done and a sunny Christmas beckons.
  12. Too hot down here for Christmas, off to Thailand ...
  13. ditto. i'll be on Koh Samui for xmas and then in Chiang Mai for new year. first holiday in a year (MrsCR preggo etc) so blowing the wages on two weeks of bliss.

    no snow, no tree, no decorations, and definitely no fucking carol singing :D
  14. I wish I was half so lucky, to go somewere tinsel free and without a hint of turkey would be great - but no such luck.

    I've got Xmas with the outlaws and Mrs Invictas tribe of siblings (there are 6 of them). With that many siblings in one place there are plenty of feuds bubbling away which always burst into the open at this time of year. This time its her dad and one of her scary psycho sisters who have taken a real dislike to the bonkers attention seeking girlfriend of one of the brothers.

    I'm going to hide away in the corner of the living room and watch the fun and games unfold. No doubt I'll be trying to make a break for it to the pub before the Queens speech at 3pm.
  15. Careful with your choice of words young CR ...