Turkish man accused of wife beating in NZ 'was dancing'

#1
BBC News - Turkish man accused of wife beating in NZ 'was dancing'

Turkish man accused of wife beating in NZ 'was dancing'A Turkish man accused of beating his wife has told a court in New Zealand they were actually performing a traditional dance.
Allaetin Can said witnesses mistook the dance for domestic violence as it involved moves that resemble punches, kicks, slaps and choking.
The dance, named the kolbasti, is thought to have been first performed by drunks in a Black Sea resort town.
The name translates as "caught red-handed by the police".
Mr Can said he and his wife Elmas were dancing outside his family's kebab shop in Hawera on New Zealand's North Island, to celebrate a good day's takings when a passer-by called the police.
He pleaded not guilty to an assault charge.
"We're always dancing, I'm happy to dance with my wife and family, but people here understand fighting not dancing," he told New Zealand media outside the court.
The trial judge has instructed police to view a video of the kolbasti before deciding if charges should be dropped.
'kolbasti' The name translates as "caught red-handed by the police". < love this bit.

anyway, hope the fella gets away with it................

now please excuse me, i'm off to kolbasti the bitch for being late with me tea.
 
#2
Our Fiijian brothers in arms have been doing that to their wives at unit functions for years.

They call their dance the "Grouse induced roundhouse to the face followed by a viscious open handed slap and severe humiliation by verbal assault".

The above attire for the male partner is a vest top, garish shorts and thong flip flops.
 
#3
Oh well, it could be worse. Some tart in a uniform made a complaint, because she was nearly sideswiped with a foriners manhood.

Man fined for assaulting policewoman with his penis - The Daily Record

Marium Varinauskas, 28, tried to strike the officer on the head with his privates when she was called to a disturbance at his flat.
I am attempting to understand how one can do that. First off, how long does penis need to be in order to be able to hit someone with it? Secondly i am starting to worry mine is not long enough. Thirdly, what position does one have to be, in order to be able to accomplish such a feat?

In hindsight it could be argued that these bastard forriners are coming over here and taking the headlines from us proper UK born and bred average uphill gardeners.(Without tossing the salad)

BTW I have no idea what an uphill gardener or tossing a salad means. I learn't it from a book.
 

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