Traveller alert

ugly

LE
Moderator
#1
Right thats the pc nonsense over with, last night coming back from feeding the birds we saw a pair in the most rotten untaxed van going looking at my neighbours machinery. Now she isnt too bright and is also very rich so will probably lose the lot but worst of all is the 10 minutes spent queueing on the non emergency plod number to pass on the vrn and I get a "we'll pass it on to the intelligence unit in the morning" response.
I despair, now the tories are in where the feck is the helo gunships to eradicate the scum?
 

ugly

LE
Moderator
#4
Last time we caught them on camera committing armed tresspass. Plod response nil. Now we have a different Govt its time to defend our property!
 
#8
Is there a limit on the size of blade. Ie: i have a Samurai Sword mounted on the wall ( i don't btw ) and i use that is that excessive?
 

maguire

LE
Book Reviewer
#9
Right thats the pc nonsense over with, last night coming back from feeding the birds we saw a pair in the most rotten untaxed van going looking at my neighbours machinery. Now she isnt too bright and is also very rich so will probably lose the lot but worst of all is the 10 minutes spent queueing on the non emergency plod number to pass on the vrn and I get a "we'll pass it on to the intelligence unit in the morning" response.
I despair, now the tories are in where the feck is the helo gunships to eradicate the scum?
dial 999 and tell plod you think they have a shotgun.
 
#10
I pulled in to my neighbours barn when I saw a white van backed up to it, pleased to find the local countryside plod had the same idea, he said hello, pointed out that it wasn't pikeys and gave me his card with his name and direct phone number and said ring any time

I thought that was excellent service, I'm sure if I ring and say watcha Mac, I've got to gypos at the end of a shotgun he'll be right along to sort it
 
#11
I must confess,,It was me and the missus in that 'rotten untaxed van',,the said machinery was a load of old rubbish,,and anyway if we had have nicked it she can afford to replace it..
 
#12
dial 999 and tell plod you think they have a shotgun.
Or course the sure way to get them there is to tell them YOU have one


...wait...
 
#13
Phone the Plod and say..

" Hello Tony Martin Here, I Think i am being burgled will sort it out myself with this shotty, just thought i would call to let you know for the paperwork and crime number later"
 

ugly

LE
Moderator
#14
Well I'll be back out tonight and next week we should have the cameras back in place.
 
#15
if any fecker even dare sniff about my property,i swear i will become extremely violent,couldn't give a toss about the consequences.
 
#16
dial 999 and tell plod you think they have a shotgun.
You've got that totally wrong, you ring the plod, telling them you are a respectable person with a house & job & you are scared the pikeys are about to attack you, so you have got YOUR GUN out & are going to shoot them first as a pre emptive strike! A helo & 2 armed response vehicles will be there before you have put the phone down!!!!
 

ugly

LE
Moderator
#17
You've got that totally wrong, you ring the plod, telling them you are a respectable person with a house & job & you are scared the pikeys are about to attack you, so you have got YOUR GUN out & are going to shoot them first as a pre emptive strike! A helo & 2 armed response vehicles will be there before you have put the phone down!!!!
100% correct, they wont attend in a rush with armed response if its just armed tresspass in Sussex, if you want the feckers arrested then you need to say you are armed and in fear of your life and willing to defend it.
 
#18
Right thats the pc nonsense over with, last night coming back from feeding the birds we saw a pair in the most rotten untaxed van going looking at my neighbours machinery. Now she isnt too bright and is also very rich so will probably lose the lot but worst of all is the 10 minutes spent queueing on the non emergency plod number to pass on the vrn and I get a "we'll pass it on to the intelligence unit in the morning" response.
I despair, now the tories are in where the feck is the helo gunships to eradicate the scum?
Obviously spoke to the wrong civvie phone operator! IIRC you're not too far from me - when I had the pikey bastards come around offering to do my driveway whilst casing my house, I phoned plod and they tugged him a few miles down the road and sent him off with a flea in his ear. I hate pikey season, but the system does work sometimes.
 
#19
100% correct, they wont attend in a rush with armed response if its just armed tresspass in Sussex, if you want the feckers arrested then you need to say you are armed and in fear of your life and willing to defend it.
Tell the rozzers you are confronted by a group of dyslexic bankers up from the city, armed with shotguns and hoping to bag a brace of peasants each.
 
#20
You know not to tell plod you have a gun don't you ugly unless you are actually in fear of your life. Even if you know the plod if it is written down it could be awkward at renewal time.
If your reporting something like a pikey van and you feel their is some skulduggery about 999 and tell them the driver is pissed. They will have a multiple orgasm because they know if they stop the guy and get a posative breath test they will get a result instead of just wagging a finger at him. Win win as they know plod are about and plod get a visual.
Alternatively why don't we on arrse start a helicopter gunship charity rather like the air ambulance. On call and covering the uk who will stop us? Mwahahahahaha!
 

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