Trains !!

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by HHH, Jun 27, 2011.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. HHH

    HHH LE

  2. Not the first time I've seen this headline! I think it was about 8 eyars ago? That hot summer in about 04? Apparently we're not the only that has this problem! It's something to do with the rails warping when its hot!
    Saying that, they still manage a good service in India and hot there!
  3. LancePrivateJones

    LancePrivateJones LE Book Reviewer

    Old infrastructure + neglect since 1948 = The present state of Britain's railways.

    Incidentally, a railwayman once explained the 'leaves on the track' thing to me and I must admit that it does seem like a huge problem. I was once on a train that tried to stop at Epsom but just skidded along the rails because of the leaf/mulch buildup, the driver had to reverse the train about 50 yards so people could get off.

    The person that comes up with a workable invention to totally remove leaves from railway lines will never need to work again and will be able to retire to the Seychelles and be carried everywhere by semi naked nubile young ladies.

    Millions to be made solving this one.
  4. HHH

    HHH LE

    Leaf blower attached to the front. Right where are these nubile young ladies!!!
  5. Not just in UK, chaos in Paris tonight with overheated trains, lines, tracks or sth. Not nice when you are stuck in a packed carriage in a hot station for 30 mins with the temp hitting 40°C ... look on the bright side, I must have sweated off the weekend's alcohol intake!
  6. Hmmmm didn't pay attention in Physics at school then?
  7. HHH

    HHH LE

    Emm, not the tracks, overhead lines!!
  8. You think someone must have screwed over the partisans of WW2. Using plastic explosive to stop trains instead of a bag of leaves, hindsight ehhhh.

    or is it only our network thats a massive pile of crap?
  9. LancePrivateJones

    LancePrivateJones LE Book Reviewer

    They have tried virtually everything including your idea.

    Problem is that the leaves stick like glue to the track when damp and other leaves are pressed into them etc causing a substantial buildup.

    As I have said, the person that solves this one will be a very rich person indeed as it's not just a problem in the UK.
  10. British public transport is a joke. It's not up to date, and it's not joined up. But no one seems to want to fix it.
  11. For the first hundred years or so of the railways, they avoided leaves on the line by keeping the embankments cut back and free of trees. Nowadays, it seems they prefer to piss the money away on something else and let the railways get overgrown by jungle - similar situation with the shite maintenance of road verges and public paths all over the country.....

  12. What about a biological corroding agent with a short half life? so the green types don't wail pollution and go try to attempt to kill railworkers in the name of the lesser spotted newt.
  13. You need to go to Spain (dump maybe) as they have air conditioned trains that play classical music!
  14. Same heat expansion, you clot! :)
    • Like Like x 1
  15. LancePrivateJones

    LancePrivateJones LE Book Reviewer

    Go and tell them, could lead to the solution.

    Seems to me the population of this country prefers the Daily Mail version of the famous 'wrong type of leaves on the track' bullshit which gives them the chance to bitch and gripe, rather than actually find out the truth of the problem which isn't difficult to understand but denies them the moaning/bitching opportunity. Either this or they are genuinely as thick as pigshit because the science is simpler than making a cup of tea.

    At the moment, the only 100% solution is a pair of hands and manual labour at night. Of course they could cut down all the trees in the country but this would probably upset the inhabitants of Surrey and Hampshire who oddly enough seem to be the biggest whingers on this subject.
    • Like Like x 1