Toy Guns.

Out and about in Lincoln this morning and a young lad, aged about 10, was aiming, what I presumed was a toy, handgun at passers by and shouting 'BANG'.

He was accompanied by a woman who I found out was the lads mother.

Now, although I served 15 years in the army, and 10 years as cop, I tend not to go **** on details that do not concern me, however, I was interested to understand why a woman would let her offspring rock about town, pretending to loose off a couple of rounds at unsuspecting members of the public.

I politely asked her what the sketch was, and whether she was afraid that somebody would report her son to Lincolnshire's Finest, who would (without doubt) turn a molehill into a mountain, close off the City centre and act like WW3 was about to kick off and generally make everyone's day a right royal pain.

She told me to '**** Off and mind my own business". Fair Do's, and I did.

Perhaps I should have punched the little chap, 'disarmed' him, and in the ensuing barney with the mother, pretend to be having a mahoosive PTSD flashback, and then, in the fullness of time claim some compo from her.

I am at a loss as to why parents would allow this to happen nowadays, although back in the day (nineteen hundred dark and freezing...) we all had toy guns. (Johhny Seven OMA anyone?) But surely that was a different, a more innocent time.

Am I turning into an anally retentive old fart, who should just stay in the pub and mind my own business?

I would have posted this in NAAFI, but, with the word **** up there...
Sorry A&M, I think your behaviour was appalling. You should have known better. The next time do the honourable thing and have a crying session and then go for the PTSD compo claim... you've let the side down. Naturally, for this sound advice I believe you owe me a Pint.


Book Reviewer
Were you never a child and played war or cowboys and indians with your mates as a young boy?
He is a kid playing ffs.
And entirely up to his parents to deal with, you are probably lucky just to be told to **** of.

... .... .. -


Book Reviewer
yes you are being an old fart the child was obviously hunting zombies
You should have snowballed the kid into surrender, on the pretext of joining in the game with hand grenades.

I wish you'd put this in NAAFI.
A kid of abut ten pointed an airsoft 92F at me the other day... naturally, I disarmed him, threw him to the ground and stamped on his head before 'gripping' him for his slack drills, poor stance etc.*

*none of this actually happened.
I seen a kid with a false beard AND he was looking at me with a slightly crazy look in his eyes, should I call the police counter-terrorism hotline on 0800 789 321 or just stick my tongue out and go PARRRRRRP!?


Book Reviewer
next doors lad was trying to stalk me so I ghillied him up and sent him after his dad instead
My grandson (age 4) told me his mum and dad has told him "we don't like guns" and that guns are "bad". He has seen pictures of me armed and in uniform, has seen some of my assorted toys in the house and knows that I have a real gun (yes, it IS all legal etc).

However, I never brought my son up to indulge in this trendy wendy, lefty "guns are nasty" shite. He has obviously gone soft since I used tp take him rough shooting for pigeons and pheasants etc.

The local sunday market has some toy stalls, at least one of which has a nice line in toy guns. I think I'll be doing some shopping when the weather improves.

Of course the real question is what type of toy gun to buy my grandson. handgun? Assault Rifle - the AK47 looks pretty good - or my favorite - a pump action shotgun?

The plan to teach grandson to refer to slow or lazy people as "idle civvies" is also coming along nicely...


So no calling the Police to warn them of a deranged youth out with a loaded gun?
Your lucky the mother did not kick the crap out of you, just for fun!
I was brought up on a steady diet of toy guns. Xmas or my birthday wasn't complete without a new plastic gun. I had guns ranging from an Uzi to an AK47. I even had a toy SLR.

My wife doesn't agree with kids having guns, but even she knows she's fighting a losing battle with that, seeing as we have twin boys. She bought them cowboy outfits for a kid's fancy dress party a few weeks ago. They came with toy pistols that we let them take them to the party. Possibly a bit insensitive as it was the weekend after the last mass school shooting in America. When we got home she promptly put the guns away.

Sent from beyond the grave using the Force.
That doesn't take caps.

This does Enfield' Antik Diecast Western Rifle: Toys & Games .No point in having a toy gun that doesn't take caps. Do the good grandfatherly thing first though, take it out in the garage, get rid of the cheap plastic stock and fabricate something better out of the old coffee table.

Personally, in the summer I bought one of these: but that might be a bit on the dangerous side, especially if somebody at school's messing him about.

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