Littlejohn's column touches on these issues today. Only thing to add, that Hague might be off form because he is still "in love"...
Dunkirk? No, it's more like Carry On Follow That Camel
By RICHARD LITTLEJOHN
Like the Treasury, the Foreign Office is supposed to contain the brightest and best of Britains civil servants. But just as the Treasury failed to anticipate the banking crisis, so Carlton-Browne of the FO seems to have been caught on the hop by the collapse of regimes across the Middle East.
This is, of course, a department of state which is said to pride itself on an intimate knowledge of Arab affairs. Yet the uprisings in Egypt, Bahrain and Libya appear to have come as a complete surprise to our diplomatic elite.
William Hague must have thought he was inheriting the keys of a Rolls-Royce machine when he became Foreign Secretary. Instead, he discovered that under the sleek coachwork it contained the engine of a Reliant Robin, carelessly topped up with red diesel.
Shambolic response: British evacuees from Libya unload their luggage in Malta
Britains shambolic response to the plight of UK citizens caught up in the revolution in Libya is not Hagues fault, but it is his responsibility.
Hague had the misfortune to be in Brussels when the balloon went up in Libya, but he only served to inflame the sense that he was out of touch when he claimed, erroneously, that Colonel Gaddafi was on his way to Venezuela.
Ten minutes later, Gaddafi turned up on television in Tripoli, waving a brolly and vowing to fight to the last bullet.
Where was Hague getting his information? Presumably from the deeply unimpressive Cathy Ashton, the EUs grand fromage for foreign affairs.
Surely the Foreign Offices supposedly sophisticated intelligence network could have prevented this unfortunate faux pas.
Hague wasnt helped, either, when the two commercial airlines, BA and bmi, immediately suspended flights to Tripoli at the first whiff of cordite. But surely there was a Plan B.
Deep in the dusty bowels of the Foreign Office there must be a folder devoted to the possibility of violence in the volatile Middle East and a contingency for evacuating British nationals poste haste.
FO officials were reduced to hitching a ride on a plane chartered by BP to ferry its own employees to safety. Im sure if anyone had picked up the phone to Richard Branson, hed have rustled up a couple of 747s and headed straight for Tripoli, complete with signature flying helmet and a posse of Fleet Streets finest in Upper Class.
We couldnt send an aircraft carrier because the Ark Royal has been pensioned off. And the only Royal Navy ship in the area was steaming back to Blighty to be scrapped because of the defence cuts. Even when diverted towards the Libyan coast, it was initially told not to dock because it might be too dangerous.
This fiasco has echoes of the capitulation in the Shatt al-Arab waterway a couple of years ago, and the refusal to rescue the middle-aged couple captured by Somali pirates, on the grounds that someone might get hurt.
This column has little sympathy with British citizens who voluntarily take lucrative jobs in despotic trouble-spots run by megalomaniac gangsters and then scream for mummy when the shooting starts. Or their whingeing relatives back home. If they take the shilling, they should accept the risk.
But one of the basic duties of any government is to ride to the rescue of citizens in distress, regardless of the circumstances.
And if the Bulgarians, Dutch and French could get their people out in double-quick time, why not Britain?
We were told yesterday that a detachment from the Special Boat Service was on standby to rescue UK citizens stranded in Libya.
But if we were planning a covert mission, why would we tell anyone in advance? And if the SBS do steam in, they could find themselves confronted by troops trained by our own SAS, as part of one of Tony Blairs grubby deals with Gaddafi, and armed with British-made weapons.
You couldnt make it up.
Much as I admire the bravery, skills and endeavour of our special forces, there is every chance that any rescue effort might end up bogged down in the desert like Jimmy Carters ill-fated excursion into Iran three decades ago.
Our reputation is already at rock bottom, following our inglorious military retreat from Iraq. I doubt this weeks events have done much for our prestige in the region, especially at a time when Call Me Dave is swanning round the Middle East with a team of arms salesmen in tow.
Meanwhile, Nick Clegg says in an interview that he had forgotten he was supposed to be running the country in Daves absence abroad and was planning to spend half-term with his children.
The Prime Minister assures us that he is in charge and is in constant contact by BlackBerry. So thats all right then. He also says that all his key ministers are on parade in London but thats only because Hague was forced to cancel a trip to Washington to have his photo taken with Hillary Clinton.
Liam Fox is probably pushing toy soldiers and model ships around a sandpit in the basement of the Ministry of Defence. But as our cash-strapped forces are already overstretched, dont expect another Dunkirk on the northern shores of Libya any time soon. Im not sure the Navy even runs to a rowing boat these days.
Sadly, the incompetence and unpreparedness of the Foreign Office appears to be replicated across practically every government department. The Home Office isnt the only ship of state which is unfit for purpose.
Admittedly, the Tory-led Coalition inherited this mess from the Blair, Brown and Mandelson junta (particularly in relation to Libya) but seems to have no idea how to sort it out.
I fear more humiliations to follow. Makes you proud to be British.
