Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by WRAPJOBAGAIN, Dec 18, 2007.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. ok here gos top tips in army or civ div

    here is mine as its cristmas.

    dont eat yellow snow.

    now stand bye for reload.

    and FIRE AWAY.
  2. Don't wipe with broken glass
  3. Don't feed dogs liquorice.
  4. i feed you.
  5. Always pick your sprouts before the first frost? :?
  6. Dont put your finger anywhere you wouldnt put your nob
  7. Minimize your food budget by scheduling meal times around Happy Hour.
  8. Don't push your Granny whilst she's shaving!
  9. Don't light your farts when (a) pi55ed (b) with no jeans or shreddies or (c) just because a load of your mates are egging you on "because it makes sense and there is a pint in it for you". The reason for this is because you will burn your ballbag, your ringer and singe all your pubes and will spend an inordinate amount of time being treated for a minor burn (applying cream) and then have the pi55 ripped mercilessly. Oh and also your other half will NOT be impressed (at least mine wasn't).
  10. Don't give your bank details to MDN...

    What the fcuk am I going to do with all these hamsters?
  11. Quality
  12. Don't wipe your arrse or have a pee after chopping chillies.
  13. dont wipe your arrse with sandpaper
  14. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Dont kiss a black labrador on the nose if the temperature is below -08
  15. Never shag a woman who gave your mate a strange disease and then for her to tell you that she's not the carrier.