Top Ten Tips to Avoid Rape

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by jack-daniels, Mar 12, 2013.

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  1. That has to be a wind up.
    No one can be that fucking stupid?
    Well no one in charge of advertising.
  2. Just choked on my toast .... that's a bit direct ... must watch out for number 4 ....
  3. wind up, seen it in a womans magazine so I checked out their website.
  4. Profound advice which I will take on board.
  5. I ve found a way round Point 5:

    Never creep into a woman’s home through an unlocked door or window, or spring out at her from between parked cars, or rape her

    It doesnt say anything about Locked Doors or Windows though does it?
  6. Be aware. JD is not happy, if he's not happy, I'm not happy.

    I have met this man a few times.

    He has never been more than perfect to me.
  7. Brotherton Lad

    Brotherton Lad LE Reviewer

    Leaping out from between moving cars could appeal to the more athletically-minded.

    It is bizarre, but then things are done differently in Scotland.
  8. .
    Must remember No. 3 ... must remember No. 3 ... must remember No. 3.
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  9. Does anyone want to challenge me in that fight?
  10. Number 7 is a load of bonkers, isn't it? Haven't we all had sex with someone when they're asleep? Julian Assange definitely has, and so has George Galloway.

    Fuck me, I'm a rapist!
  11. .
    I'm confused as to what's meant by No.6. Does it mean spit roasts are ok?
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  12. No 9 is particularly shocking.
  13. what about having sex with a woman while I'm asleep?

    and while we are at it (so to speak) why is there no mention of gay rape? Bloody sexist rape victims.
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  14. No. 8. Absolute classic.......

    Imagine the scene......

    2 men walking down a darkened alley, one of whom is unable to stop himself attacking women, being accompanied tonight by his friend......Geoff.

    Here Geoff, I've come over all funny like, I think I may be about to rape someone....

    Fuck off knob head theres only me here.......

    I know geoff but I can't help're getting it right up the shitter.....

    Hang on look here comes a defenceless pissed up chick, who's asleep, getting into a lift between parked cars that are broken down....

    Fucking sweet, here hold my whistle mate......I'm going in....

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