Thanks for the quick reply. I've managed to borrow a baseball bat and some rope for the night, but she's a stubborn b!tch and I'm afraid it might not be enough. As a backup plan, I've sharpened my leatherman so that I can slice off her eyelids. I'll make a patriot of her yet
I am in the same situation, ply her with Pinot Grigio and get her to come to yours to watch it, this may only work for us unwashed students so if it does fail you could black narsty her to the chair and make her watch it a la Clockwork Orange, it's for her own good!!
You missing out on what makes it so good!! Its because it is so shit along with films like Navy Seals, GI Jane, Rambos 1 to 94, Delta Force 1 to 350, Ultimate Force, Soldier Soldier et al that what makes them timeless classics!
Plus there are and you have to concede this some brilliant one liners!
When I first got to my proper unit after training, Top Gun was the rage. Of course me being the new duty troop sprog, I had to learn the feckin script off by heart Mistakes resulted in nasty drinks being poured down said sprogs throat
Oh and how many groups of squaddies did you see around town on their knees to some fat german squaddie basher singing "You've lost that loving feeling"?? Feckin film has a lot to answer for.
As a teenager in the 80's, on the evenings when the shagpiece's parents were out I had to endure one of the following piles of crap to get laid. Not just 1 bird made me watch this lot, they were all issued with these vids. I have since learned the truth
1) Pretty Woman. As a crafty veteran of the worldwide whoring scene I can confirm that Richard Gere ended up with a bird who will whack so much lube up her jack n danny you wont feel a thing
2) Top Gun. Most pilots are fugly overweight fart machines, its known in the AAC as the lynx effect, as opposed to suntanned volley ball champs.
3) Ghost. Bad animation drags people to hell, Derek Achorah would have been better than Whoopi Goldberg at giving Demi Moor a pearl necklace.
4) Dirty Dancing. The worst film in the world ever, Every single female who watched this pi$$ed themselves at the end when the 2 old biddies get up and start dancing. "Nobody puts baby in a corner" my c0ck.
Having endured any of this pish it was only thanks to teenage hormones that I could give her the good news after it. I'm sorry guys if you like any of these films (especially Top Gun) then you are not strictly butter side up.