Tonight I cooked..........

Orange is the Septic brown.
I don't think @RoyalGreenJacket is on the west side of the pond.

I used to have a UK colleague that would come over here and bitch about "more brown food".

Obviously, we are no longer colleagues. I wanted to lamp him several times, but never did. I just referred to him as "cockmaster" (South park reference) to all our other colleagues. Who of course then called him cockmaster back at HQ. He must have hated me :)
 
Anything over 30 degrees variation in alignment of green beans (also carrots cut longitudinally) is strictly verboten.
Also, the peas... no pea should be isolated-all must be touching another pea, unless coated in gravy, in which rule 405.08 (3rd amendment) applies.

The carrots...”pennied” carrots should NEVER be ‘doubled up’ like ‘blobbed up’ uckers bits (tactical ludo to you non-nautical types).
Sadly no peas but I did my best.
SMplate.jpg


A couple of points I was quite proud of:
The mash is divided into two unequal portions, one rounded off and one roughed with a fork
To incorporate alignment along a Z axis the mash was used as a foundation
Lack of green beans so I compromised with carrots in batons and circles
Carrot circles carefully stacked, the left pile inspired by Stonehenge and the central stack inspired by Jenga while avoiding any sort of size order
A small point but one that I think might cause our friendly plate Nazi to shit himself in apoplexy, there's one lonely carrot circle mixed in with the batons

Photo taken before the obligatory brownification to allow proper appreciation of the detail :)

Edit - putting everything onto a chopping board was a step too far.
 
Sadly no peas but I did my best.
View attachment 422001

A couple of points I was quite proud of:
The mash is divided into two unequal portions, one rounded off and one roughed with a fork
To incorporate alignment along a Z axis the mash was used as a foundation
Lack of green beans so I compromised with carrots in batons and circles
Carrot circles carefully stacked, the left pile inspired by Stonehenge and the central stack inspired by Jenga while avoiding any sort of size order
A small point but one that I think might cause our friendly plate Nazi to shit himself in apoplexy, there's one lonely carrot circle mixed in with the batons

Photo taken before the obligatory brownification to allow proper appreciation of the detail :)

Edit - putting everything onto a chopping board was a step too far.
It is most certainly a fine effort, @supermatelot will be sure to reply once the palpitations have ceased,

One question though, what exactly did you use to kill the sausages?
 
One question though, what exactly did you use to kill the sausages?
Oven. They were a little bit out of date so I gave them a bit longer to try and avoid redecorating my bathroom in shades of brown.
 
Sadly no peas but I did my best.
View attachment 422001

A couple of points I was quite proud of:
The mash is divided into two unequal portions, one rounded off and one roughed with a fork
To incorporate alignment along a Z axis the mash was used as a foundation
Lack of green beans so I compromised with carrots in batons and circles
Carrot circles carefully stacked, the left pile inspired by Stonehenge and the central stack inspired by Jenga while avoiding any sort of size order
A small point but one that I think might cause our friendly plate Nazi to shit himself in apoplexy, there's one lonely carrot circle mixed in with the batons

Photo taken before the obligatory brownification to allow proper appreciation of the detail :)

Edit - putting everything onto a chopping board was a step too far.
Outstanding :)

It's not escaped my attention however, when you say "shit himself in apoplexy" - the kids at school no doubt deliberately do the same to you :)

@supermatelot will be sending you to the office for a damned fine spanking.
 
Sadly no peas but I did my best.
View attachment 422001

A couple of points I was quite proud of:
The mash is divided into two unequal portions, one rounded off and one roughed with a fork
To incorporate alignment along a Z axis the mash was used as a foundation
Lack of green beans so I compromised with carrots in batons and circles
Carrot circles carefully stacked, the left pile inspired by Stonehenge and the central stack inspired by Jenga while avoiding any sort of size order
A small point but one that I think might cause our friendly plate Nazi to shit himself in apoplexy, there's one lonely carrot circle mixed in with the batons

Photo taken before the obligatory brownification to allow proper appreciation of the detail :)

Edit - putting everything onto a chopping board was a step too far.
I'm going to kill you.
Twice.
And @Roadster280 too - who i'm accusing of putting you up to this.
 
Tonight I BBQ'd an Aberdeen Angus Sirloin Steak in a custom Garlic powder, Salt & Pepper Rub with veg and relish......

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1570747437044.png
 

Kirkz

LE
Cooks everything on a BBQ and doesn't own any crockery.
You're homeless aren't you.
 

Joker62

ADC
Book Reviewer
Sadly no peas but I did my best.
View attachment 422001

A couple of points I was quite proud of:
The mash is divided into two unequal portions, one rounded off and one roughed with a fork
To incorporate alignment along a Z axis the mash was used as a foundation
Lack of green beans so I compromised with carrots in batons and circles
Carrot circles carefully stacked, the left pile inspired by Stonehenge and the central stack inspired by Jenga while avoiding any sort of size order
A small point but one that I think might cause our friendly plate Nazi to shit himself in apoplexy, there's one lonely carrot circle mixed in with the batons

Photo taken before the obligatory brownification to allow proper appreciation of the detail :)

Edit - putting everything onto a chopping board was a step too far.
Out fkin standing!
 
1570799380085.jpeg

Toasted granary bread with chilli and chocolate beans and black pudding. :hungry::thumright:
Added Mediterranean type dried herbs to a pot of baked beans. Spiced it up with a little chilli powder and a splash of dark naga chilli sauce. Browned with teaspoon of decaffeinated coffee and a large square of dark chocolate. Properly brown and properly tasty.
 
View attachment 422126
Toasted granary bread with chilli and chocolate beans and black pudding. :hungry::thumright:
Added Mediterranean type dried herbs to a pot of baked beans. Spiced it up with a little chilli powder and a splash of dark naga chilli sauce. Browned with teaspoon of decaffeinated coffee and a large square of dark chocolate. Properly brown and properly tasty.
Please tell me that was an "Andy Warhol" attempt at art and you didn't actually eat it.
 

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