It wouldnt be a bank holiday weekend without the inevitable mass exodus cluttering the roads, and today I lost 2 hours of my life while sitting on the M25. Its the law of the sod that as soon as I hit traffic longer than a mile in length, the need to pee appears. A quick scan of the surrounding area doesnt look promising concrete walls, 8 foot chain link fences followed by either bare banks or the skinniest trees imaginable. Given that everyone passing/stationary by the road would have a camera to hand, and I didnt fancy making my youtube debut falling off the top of the fence, attention went to passing the time. I used the following techniques: Playing with mobile phone to irritate family & friends. Trying to change the clock in the car failing whats wrong with the old type where you just push the button and the hands spin round? Still, at least its right half the year. Observing bored looking drivers/passengers. Trying to lip read the dispute going on in the car behind. Singing which is fine when done driving along as people only get a quick look, but this isnt the case when sitting still belting out Like a Virgin Dancing as above, but more pointing & laughing. Writing a mental letter to Mr Cameron and Mr McLoughlin requesting that all major motorway incidents include the delivery of portaloos at points along the queue. Thinking up inventive ways to kill the utter cunts that think putting on hazard lights makes it acceptable for them to use the hard shoulder while everyone else waits. Finally made it through to the services then got lost in the HGV area then missed the junction coming off the M25 I think someone should take the keys away. So over to you lot any stories of traffic, travel and toilets (all or one of them Im easy) from this weekend or anytime in the past, and how you passed the time!