• ARRSE have partnered with Armadillo Merino to bring you an ARRSE exclusive, generous discount offer on their full price range.
    To keep you warm with the best of Merino gear, visit www.armadillomerino.co.uk and use the code: NEWARRSE40 at the checkout to get 40% off!
    This superb deal has been generously offered to us by Armadillo Merino and is valid until midnight on the the 28th of February.

To the tune of Barbara Ann

#1
With apologies to the Beach Boys, here is a little something that crept into Cuddles' head, unbidden while reading the paper on Monday. It is very much a work in progress and I would welcome additional verses. Please send any fatwahs to HQ 1(UK) Arrse , c/o T'internet...

Bomb Denmark bomb bomb Denmark
Bomb Denmark bomb bomb Denmark
I saw a cartoon
Mohammed it lampooned
So I thought it might be best
Dress in my suicide vest
And bomb Denmark
Bomb bomb bomb bomb Denmark
You’ve got me wailing and protesting
C-4 in my vest and bomb Denmark
Went to Beirut
To light a burning pyre
Got a petrol bomb
Set their Embassy on fire
Bomb Denmark bomb bomb bomb Denmark
Bomb Denmark bomb bomb bomb Denmark


Yes, I know it is weak but it made such a nice change from the voices in my head telling me to..well that's private..that I had to share it with y'all
 
#2
Cuddles - have you got a death wish. YOu too will get a fat waaaah for that. You could be chained to a table and have nasty things done to you. Can you hear the noise coming down the road.
 
#3
Bobos effendi..come and have a go if you think you're fundamentalist enough! I will get my former Omani colleagues to lie in ambush for any Syrian/Lebanese college boys who fancy their chances. They will be sabaha with the samakun before they know it!
 
#4
It's well and good being flippant old chap. But when Bernard Breslaw rocks up on your front doorstep, covered in Kiwi Dark Tan Parade gloss, sporting a curly dagger, and shouting, "Mustaffah Leak!" , then who'll be laughing?
Eh? Eh?
 
#5
I cant, I am a monarchist, white resident, right-wing, heterosexual, normal, pikey-hating, blair-hating, 2-jags hating, barrimore-hating normal guy. I could only visit your establishment and plant some flowers, or get totally off my head in the local boozer, and throw bacon at the local mosque. Sorry if you have laid a minefield and got some local pondlife to ambush me. I believe we may just be on the same side. I have some aluminum foil though
 
#6
bobos said:
I cant, I am a monarchist, white resident, right-wing, heterosexual, normal, pikey-hating, blair-hating, 2-jags hating, barrimore-hating normal guy. I could only visit your establishment and plant some flowers, or get totally off my head in the local boozer, and throw bacon at the local mosque. Sorry if you have laid a minefield and got some local pondlife to ambush me. I believe we may just be on the same side. I have some aluminum foil though
So do I, suggest we get the local pondlife (Signal Crayfish!), wrap them in your bacon and then into aluminium foil before building big bonfire and cooking same. Omani levies will eat shellfish and grin disarmingly when reminded that these are forbidden foods according to the Quran! Then we will drink raki that will send you blind...happy days indeed and none of this Muslim v. Christian cack. We were all perfectly happy shooting communists, and the better for it I feel! 8)
 
#7
Communists are so out of favour at the moment and not classed as a sport, unlike the current ragheads. Unfortunately I have to go as the nurse has my medication ready. Nice to meet up and put the world to rights
 

Latest Threads

New Posts