Tiger Woods Christmas Card

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Pub_Regular, Dec 3, 2009.

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  1. At least he has the photo ready for it :twisted:

    Attached Files:

  2. :D good one

    why the hell does he want to cheat on her though :?
  3. That's his missus? I wonder what attracted her to the multi-millionaire famous golfer?
  4. Porridge_gun

    Porridge_gun LE Good Egg (charities)

    A hampton like a rolled up telegraph and rythmic hip movement that could match a piston engine.

    He also has smooth ebony buttocks and a tong like a serpent.
  5. It's coz heez black innit
  6. What's the old saying?

    Once you've had black and married into a billion dollar fortune, you never go back.
  7. Because even if you're being fed fillet steak every single day of your life, you still really fancy some beans on toast once in a while. :wink:

    Every married man on this forum would throw one up some dirty scratter of a house cleaner if he thought he wouldn't get caught, no matter HOW pretty the wife is. And usually they're not.
  8. My my,what a huge club you have.
  9. Black you say?? You sure..never noticed! You will be telling me they have a black President next! ;)

    Last time I saw a black guy outside such a beautiful house, he was being clubbed by cops for breaking and entering ;)
    TIGER Woods yesterday confirmed there had been transgressions in his marriage, but insisted they all had magnificent charlies.

    'And I've won 14 majors'Following frenzied speculation surrounding his 2am car crash, the world's greatest golfer finally released a statement admitting he was no longer tedious.

    Woods said: "I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart, but my Christ, you should have seen them.

    "When transgressions like that bounce playfully across your eyeline it takes super-human strength not to follow them to the bar and say 'Hello, I am Tiger Woods'.

    "Those are the five most powerful words in the English language if crazy hotel sex is at the top of your to-do list and unfortunately I have not been true to my values by using them again and again and again. And again."

    Meanwhile gap-toothed television viewers across America's Deep South have expressed relief that Woods has finally started acting like a proper black man.

    Alabama grits farmer Roy Hobbs said: "I was gittin' real confused and fearful for a times back there. What with his impeccable manners and white man's speakin' voice, I was thinkin' maybes ma TV was on the fritz.

    "But then he done wrecks his pimped-up Cadillac, cheats on his little white babymomma and runs away from the po-lice.

    "That sumbitch is black and all is right with my world again. Praise Jesus."

  11. Well said that man!
  12. Because he can ?
  13. If I remember correctly, she doesn't swallow.
  14. She bloody does! You're probably thinking of her twin sister.

    No duff, she does have one:

  15. You'd nail that till the neighbours complained about the smell....