"Three Quid a month" Adverts that grip my corn filled sh....

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by MrShanklysboots, Mar 3, 2008.

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  1. Yes. I'm three quid poorer

    11.5%
  2. No. So I don't give the blackmailing swine a penny

    88.5%

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  1. Following some unexpected down time I have a new subject of my outrage. Three Quid a month is all it takes to save the world apparently. I could not give less of a shit.

    "Ngengwe has to drink from a water supply that teems with parasites, she suffers from River Blindness because of it"

    Don't drink the water you cack eyed fool. Why not beer? Or the fresh blood of a child weaker than you? Darwinism in action. You didn't see Helen Keller bleating did you? Come to that, neither did she.

    "My Mummy stays with me at the hostipal, and my nurse makes me laugh"

    Your Mummys place is at your side you wall eyed laboon and your nurse should be doing something other than japing for your amusement to earn her tax funded wage, the slut.

    "We can provide a safe home for Rover, we never put a dog down"

    Really? Not even the mad eyed ones that bite themselves when more likely targets like tramps or six year olds don't present themselves?

    "We will put a stop to Child Abuse. Full stop"

    Take the snot nosed dribbler from my screen. You say abuse. I say Lawful correction. As do many of my colleagues in the Jersey Senate.

    My three quid stays where it is. Fuck em. We had an earthquake, no fecker in the sub continent had a whip round for us did they?
     
  2. Yea got fcuked off with all these adverts around christmas.

    God I could be given a sainthood if I signed up to all this lot
     
  3. Stacker1 can't afford a pint just 3 pounds (87 quid if in london) could help cure him of this terrible affliction.
     
  4. Try Terps or Meths then
     
  5. [​IMG]

    CHARLIE IN HIS SPECIAL SPOT. CHARLIE LIKES HIS CAGE A LOT. HE IS ABLE TO GET AWAY FROM THE OTHER DOGS WHO CAN SOMETIMES BE A BIT ROUGH. CHARLIE ISN'T AFRAID OF THEM, BUT BEING A PARAPLEGIC, HE HAS TO BE CAREFUL. AFTER AN INJURY TO HIS SPINE, CHARLIE IS UNABLE TO MOVE HIS HIND QUARTERS, BUT HE IS STILL ABLE TO PLAY WITH HIS PALS.



    Visit the site at

    http://www.canadianvoiceforanimals.org/Charlie.html

    They even play slushy music to get you to part with your money
     
  6. Well thats tastes than diamond white I suppose.
     
  7. No he can't. He is a canine dribbler. Stephen Hawkinge is a very clever man but you wouldn't expect him to be the life and soul of the fucking party.

    Top Charlie says I. Then feed it to the pigs.
     
  8. I particularly object to the ones which ask you to sponsor a child for £15 a month. Bollox, what do I get in return, I mean if I am sponsoring someone I want evidence of something, I wanna see them run a marathon for the money, each and every month just for my personal entertainment.
    I do remember once reading a flyer in RAF Akrotiri for a scheme called Send a Cow to Africa. Was reading it to try and see whether I could sign Mrs Outcast up for it :)

    One scheme I might sign up to, we send £15 a month to get a foreign kid through school, on their 18th Birthday, they have to come pay you back in kind. Hmm, maybe not, that sound too much like grooming lol.
     
  9. Above the Help the Aged head office on Pentonville Rd, there is (or was last year) a huge black and white banner showing a pensioner's terrified eyes in close-up, with the tagline "Maud knows what's coming next".

    It's strangely erotic.
     
  10. The thing that really grips my shit about these campaigns is that the charities would have a damned sight more money to go around curing blind, abused third-world children and their puppies if they didn't piss it all away on marketing agencies and web-designers.

    If you want me to give up my hard earned I want to be sure it'll be used to actually help the ones you're bugging me on behalf of, not support an overpaid bunch of wide-boy pricks in red braces!

    Stand still, carry it on!
     
  11. No, kill two birds with one stone. Feed the paraplegic dogs, three-legged cats and blind bunnies to the poor. No more need for PDSA or Oxfam.
    Or feed the poor to the dogs, cats and bunnies, either works for me.
     
  12. I donate £3 a month to PG Tips!
     
  13. We save the children, will you ?

    No. Try getting their governments to stop killing people for 5mins and spending money on food rather than private jets. Besides famine is natures way of telling you you are shit at land management .
     
  14. Yes Peter, you can stop now.
     
  15. seaweed

    seaweed LE Book Reviewer

    The dog one is shown on Cartoon Network so that children will blackmail their parents into coughing up. Underhand I think.