Things you do when your really, really pissed....

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Pebbles015, Aug 11, 2012.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. sat in the pub i work after hours, talking on arrse, spooks and scary shit going on...nah bother!

    But fuck me, what have I just discovered??????

    Been using my phone as an ashtray and been checking the ashtray for messages for the last hour! Twunterful! (new word, trademarked for use only by members of arrse)
    • Like Like x 3
  2. 1. Throw up.
    2. Sing to people down the phone.
    3. Fall asleep where I fall over.
    4. Piss myself.
  3. Cry, vomit, pass out... It's the gin, I blame the gin
    • Like Like x 1
  4. That's right. Blame the gin when you know full well that it's the mojito and wasp chaser...
    • Like Like x 1
  5. two replys, both women, both vomit, both gin related...common denominator????
  6. Mr_Fingerz

    Mr_Fingerz LE Book Reviewer

    Fall asleep.
    Ensure that the rest of the house gets no sleep by snoring like a chainsaw going through teak.
    Wake up feeling grumpy (but then I roll over and feel happy instead) (yes folks the old ones really are the old ones).
    • Like Like x 1
  7. When I'm really pissed I have a bad habit of wandering away and doing weird things like climbing onto lock ups or lying on main roads (running away at the sound of a car) all by myself as if I'm some kind of fucking quirky, 'damaged' genius.

    There is that moment when you're getting drunk, though, where for a time you feel really content and you're just at peace with the world. It feels fucking amazing. You're warm inside, glowing, happy, a bit horny and everybody's you're mate. Once you reach that state you should stop drinking (at least for a bit) but we all have another one because we think it'll make the feeling last longer and that tips us over the edge into the prick zone.
    • Like Like x 8

  8. Know what your saying mate but the more we drink the cleverrer and more handsomer we become! (its law see!)
    • Like Like x 1
  9. Of course, mate, of course.

    Not trying to kill yer buzz, just making a wee observation.
  10. so what yer fookin sayin like laaar? Im not hansooome and cleveristest?
    • Like Like x 1
  11. Spend a couple of grand buying a trike on ebay that's broken and miles away.
    How come I never lose my connection at those times.
    • Like Like x 1
  12. User name explains that one mucker, maybe you should have listened more in class
  13. How Many Bears Could Bear Grylls Grill, If Bear Grylls Could Grill Bears?

    Took me two or three goes to say it correctly out loud...


  14. Chat up the most beautiful lass you've ever seen. Wake up next to the most gopping bad excuse of a women.
    • Like Like x 3
  15. How's the heid this morning chap?