Things you can do in the mob that you cant do at Uni

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by man_in_blue, Sep 4, 2007.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. man_in_blue

    man_in_blue Clanker

    Title says it all really. I'm belatedly making the leap into the world of higher education, cheap(ish) SU drinks, easy student ladies and oh so easily offended right on lecturers!

    So what can't I do there that I'd get away with in the mob? So far I've been told by others:

    1. Mercilessly winding up lefties from day one is seen as a bit rude.

    2. Losing control of all three orifices in the middle of the student union and being proud of it is seemingly not the done thing.

    3. Likewise, shouting "naked bar!" and proceding to get nekkid is frowned upon.

    4 Performing any of the suggestions in the "things to do in the block" thread in student halls will wind up with me homeless in pretty short order.

    Any other ideas chaps?
     
  2. Buy a 'nuke the whale' t-shirt
     
  3. spike7451

    spike7451 RIP RIP

    Wear a 'F*ck Greenpeace' Tee-Shirt.....

    Shoot people....

    Blow things up.....

    Shag the teacher...
     
  4. I thought that was compulsory
     
  5. Carry a heavy but smallish carryall with some slightly rancid meat in it while acting very protective of it and, when asked what's in it, reply in a conspiratorial whisper before moving away quickly:-

    "I found Maddie..."
     
  6. Pox_Dr

    Pox_Dr LE

    :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  7. Bridge

    Bridge Swinger

    Just spat my brew all over the laptop...now smells of burning.
     
  8. theiftaker

    theiftaker Crow

    Liar bridge, but that was funny
     
  9. Have a wash that actually includes soap as part of the process. Stinking students!
     
  10. dorsetross88

    dorsetross88 Old-Salt

    Sick joke BUT cannot stop p1ssing myself.

    now wait for the parents to sue you.....HA!
     
  11. Wear a t-shirt saying "All students are cnuts"
     
  12. Bigdumps

    Bigdumps Old-Salt

    Yeah students are cnuts, I know this. I am one.
     
  13. All students are cnuts except bigdumps.
     
  14. Benny687

    Benny687 Old-Salt

    i was refused entry to a bar over the weekend for "not being a student"

    my reply should have been 'well not being a student should be a fucking good reason to let me into your bar you fat stinking bastard cos i will drink more beer without falling over probably wont be sick all over your staff...probably'

    my actually reply was 'uuugggrrrhhgg fucking soap dodging....<dribble some half eaten subway sandwich> bastard hippies....grrruuuuuuulmmmm <fall over>'

    anyone ever been to headingley in leeds?
    charming place.

    benjy
     
  15. On the other hand- much better looking girls.