Things to do to a scum sucking piece of filth ?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by crash test, Jan 14, 2011.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Won't go into details, but someone has seriously pissed of my family and I'm need of some suggestions.

    I'll start off with,

    1. 9mm to the forehead.

    or my preffered choice

    2. Nail their bollocks to a bench then slowly roast them with a blowtorch.

    I await the incoming.
  2. Just do it, posting it on here before you do it will just land you in Jail. If you really was going to do either of those things you would have done it by now :p

    Good luck getting away with it eitherway Cheerio
  3. As your from Sheffield I recommend a WKD fueled scuffle in the street outside Yates, lots of shouting and someone will rip someones tight white t shirt, before the police turn up and you shout a lot about getting your cousin or brother involved, while your bloaty head girlfriend screams "It's not worth it Darryl, leave it, its not worth it!".

    Am I on the money?
  4. Thanks for that, constructive I think not !!
  5. Arby, I'm 43 for christ's sake, I wouldn't be seen dead inside, never mind outside Yate's.
    By the way, my wife is far from being a " bloaty head ", take it back you bounder !!
  6. If you've got a 3/8 chuck, why not make full use of it and go for a 10mm. I would recommend a wood bit, as it will make a cleaner cut of the flesh.
  7. A plank of wood with a nail hammered half way through it. Moe from the Simpsons chased Aliens away from invading the Earth with a plank with a nail in it, so I'm pretty sure it'll work in real life.
  8. Fuckin kill the cunt innit.
  9. make him suck you off then tell him you had better, that'll hurt his feelings
  10. A bounder, you say? I am a lot of things, a cheat, a drunk, a theif, a mouth rapist, but I am not a bounder. Im a gentleman. Just ask bloaty head.
  11. Whatever you do, good luck with getting away with it now that your intention has been put on t'web.

    If the revenge warrants a police investigation one of the first things they will do (after putting their fingers up your bottom to check for something or other) would be to trawl through your pc/lappy hard-drives,all your sms'ssss, mobile calls, emails and snail voila, hoist with your own petard, a full confession on ARRSE which is admissable in all the Courts of the world.

    Best thing to do is as someone cleverer than me said, oohh last week I think, "Speak softly and carry a big stick...then hit the twat on the back of the head" I might have paraphrased that.
  12. That's all too simple to go and damage someone, you really ought to give it more brain cells in your revenge. The more data you have on someone the better, and you can get someone else to do the job for you. For instance....

    Even a phone number is a good start. Then go off masquerading as them on YouTube,etc posting lurid comments about children and giving out said phone number. Another is to leave the number in mens toilets.

    Fictitious Facebook accounts are always a giggle, gain as many friends as you can then put as much known details as possible before starting to post pictures of.... well whatever you like.

    Dating sites are also great fun, choosing a few absolute desperate mingers and then supplying the address to turn up to, sit back a watch the fireworks.

    You can do all these from the comfort of your own home too.... It's not me by the way is it? If it is, don't do any of that, it's wrong.
  13. RVA

    RVA Swinger

    You'll get more replies if you do. If the truth isn't lurid enough, just make something up. Do an Advanced Search on 'revenge' in the NAAFI Bar, there's ten pages of threads on the subject. That should keep you in Monty Burns mode for days.
  14. Winding up a few bunny boilers from plenty of fish and then abandoning them with nothing but the target's address and the target's partner's mobile number??

    Seems like a good idea but only really endorsable if you post pictures here of said bunny boilers.
  15. A sock-full of snooker balls to the back of the head has been known to be eminently satisfying. (But don't tell the coppers I said so.)