Things that irritate me

[DK27]

I know what you mean. I'm the sort who will walk away from a confrontation in a pub if I haven't already managed to avoid it unless I'm absolutely pushed into a corner and fighting is the only recourse. Red mist takes over though. I suspect most of us are like that although I have had friends and colleagues over the years who are decent blokes who openly admit that they like a scrap and it's not a good night out without one and can back it up*.

I don't understand it myself and on the rare occasions when I have had to get stuck in it is because some idiot in my company has mouthed off or taken exception to another idiot mouthing off. I'd rather have a quiet pint and a letch at the totty that I have no chance of pulling.

*Is it just 'Wegians because an old Jockanese accquaintance of mine, a lovely bloke when sober, would have one sniff of the barmaid's knickers and then could start a fight in a nunnery.

A fight in a nunnery. Is liquid chocolate involved? Asking for a mate.

 

[CharleyBourne]

A fight in a nunnery. Is liquid chocolate involved? Asking for a mate.

It's early doors so I thought I'd get in first.......

Father Jack Walt.

 

[scoldog]

Z bit late, but Lidl was still selling LR41s as of this morning. Poundshop will also have the usual Kodak 'CR selection' behind the counter if you ask nicely

Even if I had you buy these for me and ship them to Australia, I doubt they'd get here any faster than what it takes for the companies down here to repack their batteries.

Thanks for the heads up though.

 

[scoldog]

#metoo

For something as simple as a puncture you ruin the tyre after spraying that repair gunk into it.
Kerching!

But at the other end, if you get a blow out, no compressor in the world will re inflate your tyre.

These days, if you are lucky, you get one of those bloody skinny replacement tyres that limits the speed you can travel to get to the garage/tyre shop to repair/replace the main one. Even when the car has storage space for a full spare tyre.

 

[scoldog]

But it now seems perfectly acceptable to make all of your calls on speakerphone in public

I just join in the conversation. They shouldn't have it broadcast to the public if they didn't want audience participation

 

[DK27]

New moan, first world problem and probably getting more miserable as I get older.

People who repair their cars/vans outside your house (live in a terraced) when there is space outside their own. Won't do their stuff outside their own place because it will disturb their family. OK to disturb us and the families either side though?

 

[Lardbeast]

Yes, when tyre wear was a ten thousand life.
We are now into the silly territory of having 4 alloys and a steel spare.
And thirty k miles is not unusual.

My wheels get a 5k rotation.
Which means replacing all 4 at once, and the spare lasts 2 cycles.

Seeing as this is the things that irritate thread, It's entirely possible that I can lay claim to that title. I drive a housewifey type car that the degs like and generally bimble along in the left lane trying to stay out of folks' way. Equipped with four furmonsters in the back, a YETI litre mug for my brew and whatever I've decided to carry on that occasion to phucque up someone's day, I tend to take it easy, avoid shit and just enjoy the company of my slavering, drooling horde and a quiet cuppa.

Although I do stick to the left lane and keep out of the way of others, there's always the odd taxi or boy racer who gets a bit excited. Generally a cheery wave and wishing them a merry aneurism sends them on their way. Being a bit grey, grumpy and finding the thought of them bleeding out into their craniums fairly humorous, their stupidity does little to disrupt my travels.

Pride in ignorance.

Some years back I was reading a book at work during my break.

A colleague in a manner reminiscent of the classic Bill Hicks sketch asked me what I was doing.

Me, on giving the obvious answer, had the reply, said with obvious pride;

"I've never read a book in my life me", the tone and inference being that by reading I was lacking in manly attributes.

I let it go as the poor fcuker has missed out on a lot and it may or may not have been his own fault ie. undiagnosed dyslexia.

Telling them you're fishing for idiots and you've just caught one can be amusing. The slow dawning of realisation is comedy gold. That or tell them you're surfing the break at Oahu and watch them try to figure it out.

As for pride in their ignorance, I find it impossible to imagine having so little going on in my head. You see the absolute dedication to their phones and zero interest in anything else around them. If they were taking in a physics course it would be understandable but close to 100% of the time it's what our Sharon said about Tracey next door or the opinion of some vacuous influencer about the latest bit of tat it's been given to shill.

The human race is devolving. When the morlocks start eating each other, it would be nice to be sat on the stoep of a farmhouse in the Karoo with a jug of rum, some good mates, a Martini Henry .577/450, 50000 rounds of ammunition and a five mile field of fire all round.

 

[Kroneit44]

We went out for a meal at a lovely pub the other Sunday, woodburners, sofas, great food etc, not ruined but spoilt by the numerous mongs around who thought we all want to hear the hilarious cat falling off roofs dits from YouTube on their phones because they cannot engage in conversation or even sit in silence for more than a minute without being "entertained". Fcuk off to McDonalds you cnuts.

I don’t have an issue with the way this has gone, it beats pretending I’m interested in what she is talking about. With you on the playing of clips endlessly. I have a mate that does it, but I genuinely think that he’s still amazed that phones have cameras.

 

[single malt]

Seeing as this is the things that irritate thread, It's entirely possible that I can lay claim to that title. I drive a housewifey type car that the degs like and generally bimble along in the left lane trying to stay out of folks' way. Equipped with four furmonsters in the back, a YETI litre mug for my brew and whatever I've decided to carry on that occasion to phucque up someone's day, I tend to take it easy, avoid shit and just enjoy the company of my slavering, drooling horde and a quiet cuppa.

Although I do stick to the left lane and keep out of the way of others, there's always the odd taxi or boy racer who gets a bit excited. Generally a cheery wave and wishing them a merry aneurism sends them on their way. Being a bit grey, grumpy and finding the thought of them bleeding out into their craniums fairly humorous, their stupidity does little to disrupt my travels.



Telling them you're fishing for idiots and you've just caught one can be amusing. The slow dawning of realisation is comedy gold. That or tell them you're surfing the break at Oahu and watch them try to figure it out.

As for pride in their ignorance, I find it impossible to imagine having so little going on in my head. You see the absolute dedication to their phones and zero interest in anything else around them. If they were taking in a physics course it would be understandable but close to 100% of the time it's what our Sharon said about Tracey next door or the opinion of some vacuous influencer about the latest bit of tat it's been given to shill.

The human race is devolving. When the morlocks start eating each other, it would be nice to be sat on the stoep of a farmhouse in the Karoo with a jug of rum, some good mates, a Martini Henry .577/450, 50000 rounds of ammunition and a five mile field of fire all round.

If you include some malt Whisky I'll be there to help you reload

 

[Lardbeast]

You'll be there with your own toys in a support fire role with my mates to pick off any that get through. Anything beyond 600 yards is mine.

 

[Issi]

Cheers mate. I'm more p1ssed off with myself as it could have been a couple of bigger boys and I could have been putting myself on offer because as we all know there are some nasty fcukers out there.

ed. to add. Since having my son who is now seven, I am conspicuously less likely to get involved.

I mentioned in the emperor mongs thread about me making a certain gesture at a biker who was showing off by speeding through a 20 zone, and revving his bike so that everyone would turn around and check out his awesomeness

He followed me to the next lights , and we had quite a lively discussion which left me quite shaken, and feeling a bit foolish for not minding my own business and just tutting at him.
Seemed a good idea at the time though .

 

[Ortholith]

I learned a new word today........

' Edgelord '

Urban Dictionary: edgelord

A poster on an Internet forum, (particularly 4chan) who expresses opinions which are either strongly nihilistic, ("life has no meaning," or Tyler Durden's special snowflake speech from the film Fight Club being probably the two main examples) or contain references to Hitler, Nazism, fascism, or...

www.urbandictionary.com

I have observed more than a few on Arrse over the years - and yes the species irritate the fúck out of me.....I'm entitled to be old and grumpy.

And yet Fight Club was probably more accurate than most in predicting where society was going. Cheap credit, low paying jobs, everyone working to desperately pay off shit in their homes they didn't actually own and hating it.

"You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everyone else. We are all part of the same compost heap"

 

[Tool]

You'll be there with your own toys in a support fire role with my mates to pick off any that get through. Anything beyond 600 yards is mine.

Denel NTW-14.5 owning walt.

 

[Kroneit44]

I mentioned in the emperor mongs thread about me making a certain gesture at a biker who was showing off, by speeding through a 20 zone, and revving his bike so that everyone would turn around and check out his awesomeness

He followed me to the next lights and we had quite a lively discussion which left me quite shaken, and feeling a bit foolish for not minding my own business and just tutting at him.
Seemed a good idea at the time though .

A friend of mine used to run a language school in Chichester. They were running a picnic for the kids in a local park. A girl was stood off a few metres away shouting racist abuse. My mate went over and told her to **** off (fight fire with fire). Back home that evening there's a knock at the door, which he answered. He received a life changing shoeing that hospitalised him. It seems that the girl was related to a senior 657 member. Sad tale saw his confidence shattered, bottle hit, divorced and eventually left the country.

 

[Ortholith]

A friend of mine used to run a language school in Chichester. They were running a picnic for the kids in a local park. A girl was stood off a few metres away shouting racist abuse. My mate went over and told her to **** off (fight fire with fire). Back home that evening there's a knock at the door, which he answered. He received a life changing shoeing that hospitalised him. It seems that the girl was related to a senior 657 member. Sad tale saw his confidence shattered, bottle hit, divorced and eventually left the country.

657? FEG? I guess a race group along the lines of Combat 18 but I've never heard of them before. Sad story though.

 

[Kroneit44]

6.57 Crew - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

 

[Issi]

A friend of mine used to run a language school in Chichester. They were running a picnic for the kids in a local park. A girl was stood off a few metres away shouting racist abuse. My mate went over and told her to **** off (fight fire with fire). Back home that evening there's a knock at the door, which he answered. He received a life changing shoeing that hospitalised him. It seems that the girl was related to a senior 657 member. Sad tale saw his confidence shattered, bottle hit, divorced and eventually left the country.

That’s absolutely shocking.

I am going to have to moderate my attitude, as I’m constantly being told off for beeping at twats, and glaring at undesirables.

 

[Civvy Scum]

Down at the eldest's in Gloucestershire. They've been in their new-build now for 7 months or so. Had a look in the garage and there's a load of cardboard boxes that they haven't had time to get rid off. The joys of both of them working all hours. They've got a recycling box to put cardboard/paper in but it's tiny.

I had a look online and with GCC you need to book a slot to take some crap to the tip. 8 pages of a website to wade through. To take your crap to the tip. Apparently you need to take your booking confirmation with you otherwise you'll be told to eff off. To take some crap to the tip. Really? Bloody jobsworths.

At home in God's own county, you just take your crap to the tip. No irrelevant bureaucracy.

Now it could be that the GCC booking system is a covid thing that might have been scrapped. In which case they ought to update their website. Who knows, certainly not me.

Anyhoo, I started to make a booking. To take some crap to the tip. FFS. Got to the bit where I put the house postcode in. Surprise, surprise, according to GCC's website, the postcode doesn't exist. New-build estate, see? Well at least 7 months old but I guess GCC can't rush these things, eh? Nice one GCC, you useless feckers. I'll be phoning them tomorrow to find out what to do. I don't think I'll hold my breath for them being overly helpful.

I wonder if Gloucester have a fly-tipping problem? If they do, I suspect I know the reason why...

 

[vvaannmmaann]

You are my "go to" for advice on women and work issues. Never have you let me down.

And when it goes to trial, tell his Lordship that a bigger boy told you to do it. You'll walk away as a free man.

 

[vvaannmmaann]

Down at the eldest's in Gloucestershire. They've been in their new-build now for 7 months or so. Had a look in the garage and there's a load of cardboard boxes that they haven't had time to get rid off. The joys of both of them working all hours. They've got a recycling box to put cardboard/paper in but it's tiny.

I had a look online and with GCC you need to book a slot to take some crap to the tip. 8 pages of a website to wade through. To take your crap to the tip. Apparently you need to take your booking confirmation with you otherwise you'll be told to eff off. To take some crap to the tip. Really? Bloody jobsworths.

At home in God's own county, you just take your crap to the tip. No irrelevant bureaucracy.

Now it could be that the GCC booking system is a covid thing that might have been scrapped. In which case they ought to update their website. Who knows, certainly not me.

Anyhoo, I started to make a booking. To take some crap to the tip. FFS. Got to the bit where I put the house postcode in. Surprise, surprise, according to GCC's website, the postcode doesn't exist. New-build estate, see? Well at least 7 months old but I guess GCC can't rush these things, eh? Nice one GCC, you useless feckers. I'll be phoning them tomorrow to find out what to do. I don't think I'll hold my breath for them being overly helpful.

I wonder if Gloucester have a fly-tipping problem? If they do, I suspect I know the reason why...

Still a thing in Scotland. Tried to take some rubbish from Dad's house to be recycled (landfill at Blackdog by all accounts) Told I wasn't allowed in. Booked on line - all good. Arrived at appointed time, barrier didn't open. Backed up 10 metres and drove through their yard to the skips. Bloke in hi viz sat in his hut, barely looked up.