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Things that irritate me

Jet Ski Drivers. The hounds and I enjoying a quiet walk on Sully Beach on Sunday afternoon along with plenty of others. Last chance before the new round of Covid restrictions kick in. A dozen dickheads arrive and go pointlessly and noisily up and down the bay. What are they for? I see the initial speed rushing just driving in circles. Spoilt the afternoon for everyone else.
 
There is no such thing
Yes there is. they're the ones who don't keep the coal in the bath on account of the fact that they piss in it on the very rare occasions when they have a bath.
 
Jet Ski Drivers. The hounds and I enjoying a quiet walk on Sully Beach on Sunday afternoon along with plenty of others. Last chance before the new round of Covid restrictions kick in. A dozen ********* arrive and go pointlessly and noisily up and down the bay. What are they for? I see the initial speed rushing just driving in circles. Spoilt the afternoon for everyone else.

Nothing that some suitably-positioned uprights and a length of piano wire couldn't solve......
 
Have you forgotten your tablets today?



Totally agree that we have thrown away 'survival of the fittest', replacing it with 'survival of the loudest'.

Think of them as a source of protein for when it all goes tits up. Going to be some good crackling on some of those fat cunts.
 
Starting to hear more and more the horrible rising voice pitch at the end of sentence, making every sentence sound like a question.
A Southern Hemisphere import I believe, though starting to hear Yanks do this now.

Fuck off! The civilised bit of the southern hemisphere doesn't speak that way.
 

Issi

War Hero
Jet Ski Drivers. The hounds and I enjoying a quiet walk on Sully Beach on Sunday afternoon along with plenty of others. Last chance before the new round of Covid restrictions kick in. A dozen ********* arrive and go pointlessly and noisily up and down the bay. What are they for? I see the initial speed rushing just driving in circles. Spoilt the afternoon for everyone else.

I'm down the coast from you, and I totally agree with you. Lovely summer days ruined by nautical irritants.
 
Spent a couple of hours in a restuarant last night. The tables either side of me had diners in their twenties. Every single sentence that they uttered contained the word, "like" (often used more than once). For example:
Woman: "My client asked me to to meet her customer and like I didn't get home until late that evening."
Man: My girl friend said she wanted me to visit her mother and I was like really pissed off as I knew she kinda like hated my guts."
At first I thought it was hilarious but by the time I left I found it infuriating.
I think I see a solution to this problem:

Go to an eaterie that attracts a better class of clientele- and cease considering Wetherspoons carveries as 'restaurants'.
 

Mary Hinge

War Hero
I think I see a solution to this problem:

Go to an eaterie that attracts a better class of clientele- and cease considering Wetherspoons carveries as 'restaurants'.
The ironic thing was, I was in a posh restaurant and the people I'm talking about all had 'creative' jobs in London. Strangely enough, I was in a 'Spoons prior to going to the posh restuarant.
Are you like part of this clique I'm kinda like slanging off?
 
So fucking irritated by whining bitching students , I went for my shower when Uni Challenge was on tonight

moaning pretentious useless snowflakes getting useless fucking degrees then moaning because they aren't getting their 9000 pounds worth of tuition

potential ASDA shelf stackers the fucking lot of them

Even the wife says she wouldn't be upset of one or two died from covid 19
 
I have previously mentioned the Duty Slow Driver on here, I now have his aquatic equivalent.
The Duty Slow Swimmer.
After the Government saved us all and allowed pools to reopen I have been able to resume my daily chlorine therapy.
In order to protect us in what must be a pretty aseptic atmosphere the pool is now divided into 3 sets of lanes: Slow, Medium and Poseur each of which have a clockwise/anticlockwise circuit to follow.

Now I reckon I'm an OK swimmer and as I don't own a swimming cap, feel the need to place a water bottle at the side of the pool, do fancy turns at the end, unless its the second set when they have to stop and rest for 5 mins coz they're knackered from all the grunting and splashing they did, I go in the medium lane.

This for the most part works fine, I'm in the upper end of medium so can use to centre lane to pass and will wait at the end for half a length so I don't end up nipping at the heels of the person in front. But then duty slow swimmer arrives. He is an old bloke who drives a Rover 75, takes 10mins to get changed to get in the water and doesn't so much swim as flail his arms around weakly like a confused old person who's been strapped into one of those chairs Ambulances have. If you stuck a red blanket over his legs when he does his back stroke parody you'd be looking for the Paramedic, he doesn't move his legs at all doing breast stoke, they just trail in the water - I obviously have had a lot of time to study him.

He is slow, very slow and everyone has to go into the middle lane to pass him, on every fucking length. Why the old twat cant figure out that when even fat old men are zipping past he maybe should go over to the fat wheezy boys lane and let the rest of us swim without the bottleneck he creates.
And then he's got his party piece.
After creating a log jam when 3 of us have arrived at broadly the end at the same time, rather than wait and let the clearly faster swimmers set off before him, he waits until I arrive and then sets off.
Wanker.
 

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