Things that irritate me

anglo

LE
I think it is spelt MIAOW. Just saying.

Why are you saying it? Do you crave being cuddled and held by this woman? Do you yearn to spend many daylight hours curled up and asleep? Are you turning into a cat? Maybe you just want some pussy?

What would Freud say?
An actual scientific study has shown that “meow” is a compound word. “Me” is a greeting, while “yow” means “respect my personal space.” Thus, “meow” is something that cats often say to humans, but seldom feel a need to say to another cat. “Miaow” may simply be a British spelling of meow.
 
Emma “fu*king Thompson

Hypocrite of the worst kind & the weak minded fools who support the bint.
The fragrant Emma, only a couple of weeks after receiving Italian citizenship decides it's too scary on the continent so fcucks off back to UK, actually to her second home in a remote part of Scotland. Having come back from Italy does she self isolate? Does she fcuk! Goes out shopping!!

 

ancienturion

LE
Book Reviewer
The fragrant Emma, only a couple of weeks after receiving Italian citizenship decides it's too scary on the continent so fcucks off back to UK, actually to her second home in a remote part of Scotland. Having come back from Italy does she self isolate? Does she fcuk! Goes out shopping!!

Just another cowardly celebrity.
 

Grownup_Rafbrat

LE
Book Reviewer
The fragrant Emma, only a couple of weeks after receiving Italian citizenship decides it's too scary on the continent so fcucks off back to UK, actually to her second home in a remote part of Scotland. Having come back from Italy does she self isolate? Does she fcuk! Goes out shopping!!

She could have used her boat from the Extinction Rebellion demonstration. She flew back from the States for that.

Hypocrisy, thy name is Emma.
 

ancienturion

LE
Book Reviewer
I think it is spelt MIAOW. Just saying.

Why are you saying it? Do you crave being cuddled and held by this woman? Do you yearn to spend many daylight hours curled up and asleep? Are you turning into a cat? Maybe you just want some pussy?

What would Freud say?
Yes to all of them, except the last.

Freud would say "Yokel is probably overthinking this. What was Yokels relationship with their father like?"

Odd man, Freud.
 
Solitaire in Windows 10

It used to be a small unassuming game, for those boring times at work.
No registration, no internet, no frills.

Nice and simple.

Then of course Micro$oft cocked it up.
 
Technically this is mildly vexing but why cant I buy a fork?
I can go on Toolstation/Screwfix and click and collect any number of essentials for gardening, spades, shovels, hoes, garden rakes but not forks.

Why??

Admittedly I can pick one up in Wilkos (presumably they had em on Sunday when I was pondering replacing my broken one).

Oh and where's my gun?
Emergency powers brought in and no ones handed me a .455 Webley yet.
 
Technically this is mildly vexing but why cant I buy a fork?
I can go on Toolstation/Screwfix and click and collect any number of essentials for gardening, spades, shovels, hoes, garden rakes but not forks.

Why??

Admittedly I can pick one up in Wilkos (presumably they had em on Sunday when I was pondering replacing my broken one).

Oh and where's my gun?
Emergency powers brought in and no ones handed me a .455 Webley yet.
Maybe it's because forks could be offensive weapons, to use against the Zombies when the second phase of COVID-19 kicks in
 
Thick as fuck dog walkers.

I went out for a walk this afternoon, making the most of being allowed out. While walking about there's a large amount of dog shit on the ground which is fair enough, it was almost all off the paths and in the rough grass.

It then turns out some of these fucking brain donors have wrapped their dog's shit in a plastic bag and promptly abandoned that sealed bag in the middle of the path. I'd rather they just left it alone, with a bit of rain there won't be much left after a few weeks but wrapped in a plastic bag it will be there much longer.

As I was heading back the stunned cunts had gone one better and started piling up their dog shit in plastic bags. It was like a modern art version of a cairn, only instead of stones it was built of plastic wrapped shit and instead of identifying a path it identified these clueless fucking mongs as needing to be shot.

I also spotted a couple of dog owners being responsible and taking their mutt's crap back with them in bags to dispose of elsewhere.
 

Yokel

LE
Thick as **** dog walkers.

I went out for a walk this afternoon, making the most of being allowed out. While walking about there's a large amount of dog shit on the ground which is fair enough, it was almost all off the paths and in the rough grass.

It then turns out some of these ******* brain donors have wrapped their dog's shit in a plastic bag and promptly abandoned that sealed bag in the middle of the path. I'd rather they just left it alone, with a bit of rain there won't be much left after a few weeks but wrapped in a plastic bag it will be there much longer.

As I was heading back the stunned cnuts had gone one better and started piling up their dog shit in plastic bags. It was like a modern art version of a cairn, only instead of stones it was built of plastic wrapped shit and instead of identifying a path it identified these clueless ******* mongs as needing to be shot.

I also spotted a couple of dog owners being responsible and taking their mutt's crap back with them in bags to dispose of elsewhere.
Worse than than some arseholes bag up hound cable, tie a knot in the top of the bag, and tie it to the branches of trees. Surely they know someone is going to have to deal with that?

If you are going to pick it up and bag it, carrying it home or to a dog poo bin is not going to be that much trouble.

Mindlessness strikes again.
 
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Worse than than some araeholes bag up hound cable, tie a knot in the top of the bag, and tie it to the branches of trees. Surely they know someone is going to have to deal with that?

If you are going to pick it up and bag it, carrying it home or to a dog poo bin is not going to be that much trouble.

Mindlessness strikes again.
I must admit, when we had a pooch, I would sometimes tie the filled poo bag onto a tree branch, so I wouldn't have to carry the shit on the walk, but I always picked it upon the way home. . . I think.
 

jmb3296

Old-Salt
when you go out to lunch, and there is a meal deal thing (we are still in Portugal)
She goes to the counter and orders a lovely pork steak sandwich deal for me, with a beer 3 Euro 40 , but decides she doesn't want a full portion of chips , so only orders the pork sandwich, and a coffee, is confused because it comes to more than the expected cost, but forgets that she didn't order the deal for herself

then decides she wants half my ******* chips , because she didn't want a full portion, instead of getting the chips and leaving half of them , which , because they were really good , I would have finished off

and it's still illegal to kill them
I have discovered my wife hates vinegar on chips. I can cope with it.

Now when we are out I put vinegar on the chips as soon as I can. After a month or two she realised if she wanted chips she had to order them herself, no changing her mind half way through a meal and grazing mine.

Job jobbed.
 
I have discovered my wife hates vinegar on chips. I can cope with it.

Now when we are out I put vinegar on the chips as soon as I can. After a month or two she realised if she wanted chips she had to order them herself, no changing her mind half way through a meal and grazing mine.

Job jobbed.
Nice one! Virtually every bloke I know asks the wife if she wants anything before they go in the kitchen for a bijou snackette. Wife almost invariably says no, yet when he brings something back she'll decide she wants some and will just nick some. He just brought enough to whet his appetite and now he's short. WTF!! Why??
 
I have discovered my wife hates vinegar on chips. I can cope with it.

Now when we are out I put vinegar on the chips as soon as I can. After a month or two she realised if she wanted chips she had to order them herself, no changing her mind half way through a meal and grazing mine.

Job jobbed.
My OH’s weakness is Marmite. All I have to do is open a jar within 1 meter of my snack, and she’s sulking on the other side of the sofa.
 
Nice one! Virtually every bloke I know asks the wife if she wants anything before they go in the kitchen for a bijou snackette. Wife almost invariably says no, yet when he brings something back she'll decide she wants some and will just nick some. He just brought enough to whet his appetite and now he's short. WTF!! Why??
Tsk!
40+ years with the same female (yes, old fashioned, I know) has trained me that under those circs, where she flatly refuses to partake in said snackette, I always do an extra slice/add some more to my plate than I need then I offer plate to spouse on my return. Unless she is ill, she always helps herself.
I have a swiss bank full of brownie points I dip into whenever I want.
If I had stabbed her hand with a fork for grazing my chips like some of you, I would probably be a pissed up tramp on Oxford Street by now.
 
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Tsk!
40+ years with the same female (yes, old fashioned, I know) has trained me that under those circs, where she flatly refuses to partake in said snackette, I always do an extra slice/add some more to my plate than I need then I offer plate to spouse on my return. Unless she is ill, she always helps herself.
I have a swiss bank full of brownie points I dip into whenever I want.
If I had stabbed her hand with a fork for grazing my chips like some of you, I would probably be a pissed up tramp on Oxford Street by now.
With your own chips.
 

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