1. Always use the 24 hour clock.
2. Nothing squaddies do shocks you
3. Use the phonetic alphabet to spell everything
4. Wife or girlfriend is in your phone contacts as Zero Alpha
5. You refer to personal tasks as admin
6. Use VP in everyday speak
7. Your civvy mates dont understand VP
8. You dont have any civvy mates!!
9. Use target indications and clock codes to point stuff out
10. Use patrol hand signals in loud places if people cant hear you
11. Point or indicate using your whole hand
12. You dont trust your wife / girlfriend to iron as good as you do
13. You think NOT shaving is a treat
14. You refer to smoke as a double edged sword
15. You hate civvies with long hair or wearing DPM / MTP
16. You break into a cold sweat if you have to work on a Friday afternoon
17. More than 50% of your DVD collection is war movies
18. You have a 10am NAAFI break every day otherwise youd never make it through till lunchtime
19. No matter how much you get paid at the end of the month its all gone in a week with nothing to show for it
20. When leaving a phone number you always repeat it twice like a grid reference
21. You think using the same spoon to eat everything and licking it clean for a week is perfectly acceptable
22. You use VP in text messages
23. Before leaving any seat anywhere you always check your pockets and prepare to move
24. You would never dream of using the same brush to put polish on AND off
25. You still own Ron Hills and wear them when nipping to the shop / petrol station
26. You count rounds expended during a battle scene in a war film and silently mutter mag-change
27. You shout de-bus when dropping off people / the kids anywhere
28. You have a never ending list of phrases other than going for a shit to describe that very action
29. You cant help but shout Gas Gas Gas or Ease Springs if anyone farts
30. North Face, Alpine Lowe and Berghaus etc are comparable to Armani in the fashion world
31. You feel naughty when walking on grass
32. When the worst thing you can hear in the world is wake up youre on stag!
33. You sit back to wall in a pub so you can keep eyes on and clear escape routes
34. When walking through open countryside you subconsciously plan a route in dead ground
35. You give impromptu lessons on car searching to security guards at the local car park
36. You point out all the mistakes in a war/ action film and they are referred to as training videos
37. You think its weird when people ask for cutlery when they are clearly called diggers
38. Waking up with the fattest female in town makes you a legend with your mates
39. You dont smoke, you burst into flames
40. You wear flip-flops in a shower no matter where you are, even a hotel or a friends house
41. When discussing any event or outing there is always an action on section
42. You cant walk past Blacks / millets / any camping shop without going in to buy a new bit of kit
43. Your kids look puzzled when you ask them who threw the admin grenade in their bedroom
44. Black masking tape can fix anything FACT. That and a Leatherman are the only tools you will need in life EVER
45. You always use a lighter to remove lose threads, even if you have scissors
46. You think running in a circle with 30 other people punching in random directions is normal
47. You know what all your squaddie mates wives and girlfriends boobs look like even though you have never met any of them
48. Swamp is not a location in a jungle or part of the Florida everglades
49. Your wife / girlfriend fully understands hand signals, especially the On Me when out shopping
50. The only way your other half can get you up after a night on the piss is to shout STAND-TO (1)
2. Nothing squaddies do shocks you
3. Use the phonetic alphabet to spell everything
4. Wife or girlfriend is in your phone contacts as Zero Alpha
5. You refer to personal tasks as admin
6. Use VP in everyday speak
7. Your civvy mates dont understand VP
8. You dont have any civvy mates!!
9. Use target indications and clock codes to point stuff out
10. Use patrol hand signals in loud places if people cant hear you
11. Point or indicate using your whole hand
12. You dont trust your wife / girlfriend to iron as good as you do
13. You think NOT shaving is a treat
14. You refer to smoke as a double edged sword
15. You hate civvies with long hair or wearing DPM / MTP
16. You break into a cold sweat if you have to work on a Friday afternoon
17. More than 50% of your DVD collection is war movies
18. You have a 10am NAAFI break every day otherwise youd never make it through till lunchtime
19. No matter how much you get paid at the end of the month its all gone in a week with nothing to show for it
20. When leaving a phone number you always repeat it twice like a grid reference
21. You think using the same spoon to eat everything and licking it clean for a week is perfectly acceptable
22. You use VP in text messages
23. Before leaving any seat anywhere you always check your pockets and prepare to move
24. You would never dream of using the same brush to put polish on AND off
25. You still own Ron Hills and wear them when nipping to the shop / petrol station
26. You count rounds expended during a battle scene in a war film and silently mutter mag-change
27. You shout de-bus when dropping off people / the kids anywhere
28. You have a never ending list of phrases other than going for a shit to describe that very action
29. You cant help but shout Gas Gas Gas or Ease Springs if anyone farts
30. North Face, Alpine Lowe and Berghaus etc are comparable to Armani in the fashion world
31. You feel naughty when walking on grass
32. When the worst thing you can hear in the world is wake up youre on stag!
33. You sit back to wall in a pub so you can keep eyes on and clear escape routes
34. When walking through open countryside you subconsciously plan a route in dead ground
35. You give impromptu lessons on car searching to security guards at the local car park
36. You point out all the mistakes in a war/ action film and they are referred to as training videos
37. You think its weird when people ask for cutlery when they are clearly called diggers
38. Waking up with the fattest female in town makes you a legend with your mates
39. You dont smoke, you burst into flames
40. You wear flip-flops in a shower no matter where you are, even a hotel or a friends house
41. When discussing any event or outing there is always an action on section
42. You cant walk past Blacks / millets / any camping shop without going in to buy a new bit of kit
43. Your kids look puzzled when you ask them who threw the admin grenade in their bedroom
44. Black masking tape can fix anything FACT. That and a Leatherman are the only tools you will need in life EVER
45. You always use a lighter to remove lose threads, even if you have scissors
46. You think running in a circle with 30 other people punching in random directions is normal
47. You know what all your squaddie mates wives and girlfriends boobs look like even though you have never met any of them
48. Swamp is not a location in a jungle or part of the Florida everglades
49. Your wife / girlfriend fully understands hand signals, especially the On Me when out shopping
50. The only way your other half can get you up after a night on the piss is to shout STAND-TO (1)