The things you do to pass marchouts

#1
We had a large hole in the bedroom door ( not caused by a fist.. honest) and were due an impending march out from jobs worth families officer. I had the bright idea of breaking into the empty quarter nextdoor and swapping the good one for the bad... great idea of mine.
However, worse for the wear from a quick session myself and my assistant (my wife) smashed a small window to gain access and all tooled up we got the door off, struggled like hell to get it down stairs and through the window only to find it was hinged on the wrong side.. so we had to take it back and screw it all on again... damn pesky army brats breaking quarter windows... that was my excuse anyway.
 
#2
You're a scouser arent you?
 
#3
You gypo
 
#4
8O Whoa, steady on visitors to the Sappers Forum!

You never ask where all the kits coming from when we build you a bar on tour :wink:
 
#5
Oh, ok, scrub "scouser" and insert "borrower" :wink:
 
#6
sandmanfez said:
Oh, ok, scrub "scouser" and insert "borrower" :wink:
Very good of you sah, Egginthenest is brand new here, and if he hasn't spent some time lurking could well be put off by the traditional Arrse welcome :D
 
#9
Nightrained said:
Not to be the geeky internet or anything, but what does this got to do with the sapper forum. *confused*
Probably because the Sappers would show more ingenuity and adaptability than any other Corps to get past the nasty Estate Warden/ Families Officer.

I've had to bluff my way through 10 march outs in the past 11 1/2 years. The most memerable being in Arborfield when I decided to spend my last evening (having spent the past 3 days cleaning the house) with two 9 Sqn mates in the local pub. When I got back to the immaculate house I managed to spew all over the landing carpet. The wife wasn't happy and smothered the place in carpet cleaner, bleach, etc, etc, whilst I recovered.

As me and the Estate Warden (female) walked up the stairs at about 9 the next morning she commented on the 'nice smell up here'!!! Some how I managed to contain my laughing.
 
#10
egginthenest sounds like something one of my mates did no names mentioned but if i ever need a replacement door ill call you good on ya mate
 
#11
Nightrained said:
Not to be the geeky internet or anything, but what does this got to do with the sapper forum. *confused*
:roll: Geek :roll:
The original poster is, was, or knew someone in the Corps once!

Carry on like that and you will achieve Moderator status in record time, are you the son of PTP. :wink:

Your unique usage of the English Language suggests you will have an interesting career as a Signaller. :roll:

Shouldn't you be out running?
 
#15
egginthenest said:
We had a large hole in the bedroom door ( not caused by a fist.. honest) and were due an impending march out from jobs worth families officer. I had the bright idea of breaking into the empty quarter nextdoor and swapping the good one for the bad... great idea of mine.
However, worse for the wear from a quick session myself and my assistant (my wife) smashed a small window to gain access and all tooled up we got the door off, struggled like hell to get it down stairs and through the window only to find it was hinged on the wrong side.. so we had to take it back and screw it all on again... damn pesky army brats breaking quarter windows... that was my excuse anyway.
Did you get it sorted in the end or just paid up to the jobs worth?
 
#16
Toothpaste in small holes
standing on the stain
using loads of shake and vac
putting down loads of crap small things on the march in
getting the wife to do it and hiding on the estate
tried most of em and got billed once for f***ing limescale in the bog at chatham the petty civvie t**t
 
#17
In Hohne we had an Army bed and of course early one morning I was rudely awoken by the wife from my comatosed state to discover I had left a map of Africa in the bed, a wet one at that, in fact I was still putting the finishing touches to it. This was 2 or 3 days before march out. Now what to do? Take it on the chin and get billed for the matress? No I had a better plan...........send the wife to the MRS with a bladder problem, well I couldn't go could I. But it was worth it just to see the housemeisters face when I produced the Med chit to explain away the contenent shaped stain and no bill.............. :D
 
#18
spr5623 said:
In Hohne we had an Army bed and of course early one morning I was rudely awoken by the wife from my comatosed state to discover I had left a map of Africa in the bed, a wet one at that, in fact I was still putting the finishing touches to it. This was 2 or 3 days before march out. Now what to do? Take it on the chin and get billed for the matress? No I had a better plan...........send the wife to the MRS with a bladder problem, well I couldn't go could I. But it was worth it just to see the housemeisters face when I produced the Med chit to explain away the contenent shaped stain and no bill.............. :D


Priceless.......

Sparky
 
#19
egginthenest said:
laughinboy said:
Could have refit the hinges :?
Yes we could of changed the hinges but trying to explain why the door handle was on the wrong side would of been difficult. Never made claim to being a chippy!
So it didn't have a handle on BOTH sides??
:thumright:
 
#20
Mrs Gee wasn't the best cook so the oven was in rag order before march out, took the cooker outside into the garden and got a wire brush attachment on my drill......took the enamel off as well but it breezed through march out!
 

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