The things you are no longer qualified to operate anymore...

[LJONESY]

Well it was a rough evening last night with the other half...

It seems I don't know how to use our new dishwasher, which is a bit of an overly complicated PITA... Had to have the other half give me instructions in Crayola on how to use it. Followed by not being able to figure out how to use the DVR settings on the new TV and deleted one of her shows. So I have been banned from using the remote now...

I was reduced to this at the age of 36....

What have you gents been banned from touching or using in your households besides your wives?

 

[rebel_with_a_cause]

Chinagraph and talc.

 

[endure]

My genitalia...

 

[Old Stab]

I'm not allowed to use RAID.
Apparently turning the living room into an insect Auschwitz is not acceptable.

 

[lokiuk]

The washing machine, I either don't put enough in, or don't put it on low eco setting allegedly, like I GAF about crypto marxist settings on washing machines

So I leave her to it, there's no pleasing some people

 

[beardyProf]

Smugly I can say nothing, except the wife of course. Outside of the house I wouldn't dare touch the cars any more beyond basic weekly levels and tyre pressures. It appears changing a lightbulb can upset the computer so I'm taking no chances.

 

[crustyrusty]

Telling people I cook like Gordon Ramsey by cheating & using a microwave is not how chefs cook, allegedly.

 

[Krautman]

Her younger sister

 

[Ecosse]

Hoover.
Womens' work anyhow.

 

[LJONESY]

Her younger sister

Keeping it in the family huh?

 

[Krautman]

Keeping it in the family huh?

Well they look very similiar and if it is a little bit dark.
Joking aside, she would have my balls on as a necklace around her neck, the string for them made of my intestines.

 

[Sam The Bam]

These days I don't touch anything in the house after I allegedly deleted a message from her phone*. Now if there is a problem with anything like DVD players and the likes I just tell her I don't know how to do it and best if she phones one of the kids or waits until one of them visits to set whatever it is up.

* I am quite confident that she deleted the message herself for two reasons. 1. She is never off the damn thing.
2. I never touch her phone, hell I don't even know where it is kept when she's not on it.

 

[Goutyfrub]

Mrs Gouty bought a ceramic frying pan. Apparently you don’t use as much oil and cook at a lower temperature. I did some eggy bread in it, closely supervised by her I might add. It immediately burned and ruined the pan. A new one has been bought and I’m not allowed to touch it. The incident is known in the house as ‘ceramicgate’.

 

[O Zangado]

Well they look very similiar and if it is a little bit dark.
Joking aside, she would have my balls on as a necklace around her neck, the string for them made of my intestines.

I infer from the reply that you have at least carefully weighed up all the options, considered possible variations of same and probable outcomes thereof ....




....and thought the better of it. Probably a wise move.

OZ

 

[Snakecharmer]

The catch on the bra strap

 

[Sam The Bam]

A new one has been bought and I’m not allowed to touch it.

That sounds like a win to me!

 

[W21A]

I left the army as a Regimental Signels Sergeant. I am no longer qualified to teach cadets. the PRR.

 

[ugly]

Females, the human sort, spaniels are ok and some labs but females and polite company it seems

 

[LJONESY]

The catch on the bra strap

That has to hurt...

 

[jumpinjarhead]

Mrs Gouty bought a ceramic frying pan. Apparently you don’t use as much oil and cook at a lower temperature. I did some eggy bread in it, closely supervised by her I might add. It immediately burned and ruined the pan. A new one has been bought and I’m not allowed to touch it. The incident is known in the house as ‘ceramicgate’.

Very naughty.