The Stork

The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees and she explained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine months later the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest.

Little Gemma at the back of the class put her hand up and asks the teacher, "Are you sure about the stork, miss? I think you're getting your birds mixed up 'cos my big sister just got a little baby and she said it was from a shag at the beach..!!!"
A wedding toast (which I actually did use once in a Best Man speech):

Today's the day,
tonight's the night,
we've shot the Stork
So you'll be all right!

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