The stereotypical RTC recruits...and Insturctors

The old guy. No one knows why he is here, he had a good steady job before joining but decided to give the TA ago anyway. He is nicknamed 'Grandad' and generally keeps himself to himself, at the end of the course he goes for a pint with the Sgt from the drill shed to watch the darts.

The smoker. He is in a constant state of panic about when his next tab will be, he has bad skin and is very stormy, he is usually late because he is just finishing his 6th tab of a 2 minute smoking break. He will start a fight a the end of course piss up and get trooped.

The duty legend. He is awesome and acheives every task. Everyone likes him, the chicks all want to fcuk him but he is staying faithful to his long term girlfriend who is a model. He has a drunken cheeky fumble with the divs chick which he regrets for the rest of the course, the chicks love him more for this. Inevitably he gets the prize for best recruit.

The retard. He has absolutely no idea where he is or what is going on, he is friends with the smoker and as a result has just started tabbing for the first time. He drifts through the course in a permanent state of confusion and asks unbelievably daft questions. To everyone's amazement he scrapes through the course, just.

add your own, include instructors
The GrannyFanny

Was in the WRACs for five minutes in the early 1980's and is now in her late forties. With such a wealth of previous experience though, recruit training is completely beneath her so such things as turning up anywhere less than ten minutes late, paying attention to anything that is being instructed, listening in and shutting up, not answering back and generally being of any practical use whatever are not things she should be expected to do.

Is so brass necked that she actually gets away with this appalling behaviour and is given chance after chance until finally having a hissy fit on parade and tearing the OC a new arrsehole in front of the entire course.

SNLR - thank fcuk for that!
The Cadet

Has been in some cadet force before birth, it doesn't matter what cadet force as "they do all the same stuff really". Has been on a million and one exercises, is full of "useful" tips about taping up various things, multi function gadgets and sk1llz picked up doing 5 dayer nighttime nav exercises in Brecon. Speaks with absolute authority about anything military but still doesn't recognise ranks like L/Cpl of Horse. Has been on numerous live fire exercises because they've "tacked onto the end of regular exercises" or "been invited on the quiet". He's also outfitted like if the SAS went to WebTex and said, "we want a load of really sh*t gear but done up to look really ally but we only want to spend £12 a man". He's invariably a student.
Not much experience of RCT's, whatever the f*ck they are, but the one I met in the Lock Stock and Barrell pub in Halifax who was headbutted through a set of open patio doors for telling us Charlie Kray was his step Uncle and that the only reason the bullsh*tting Stab c*nt failed to take a contract with Sale Sharks was because of his TA commitments pretty much sums up my humble opinion..

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