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The State of the nation?

#3
Halford1 said:
Just heard a story, Tv crew was interviewing random 20 sumthings in the street (all orange warriors, severe speech problems, but strangly alluring [perhaps this should go in the "people you fancy that you shouldnt" thread]) about the world cup.
Who is the England Captain? the reporter asks one: "eeeeerr, is it like Sven or someone?" now ill let that 'girl' off as if you didnt like football (shudder) you might not know.

However, a sad fact was then revealed about the celebrity (and i use the term very loosely) culture we live in.
the same question was asked to another girl, sporting a delicious velour pyjama suit, to which she replied: "isnt is Coleen Rooney's husband??"

dear god, whats next, and what can be done to stop it?
Set up a new 'Standards Unit' who will operate covertly disguised as a TV crew asking dumb looking orange people questions like this. If they fail to answer correctly then they have to do a 'forefit'. Failure to comply will result in a severe slapping. Repeated failures will result in one way flight to America where they can be amongst like minded people!

Or alternitavely we can just call them all cnuts and get on with it.
 
#4
The_Cynic_Clinic said:
Halford1 said:
Just heard a story, Tv crew was interviewing random 20 sumthings in the street (all orange warriors, severe speech problems, but strangly alluring [perhaps this should go in the "people you fancy that you shouldnt" thread]) about the world cup.
Who is the England Captain? the reporter asks one: "eeeeerr, is it like Sven or someone?" now ill let that 'girl' off as if you didnt like football (shudder) you might not know.

However, a sad fact was then revealed about the celebrity (and i use the term very loosely) culture we live in.
the same question was asked to another girl, sporting a delicious velour pyjama suit, to which she replied: "isnt is Coleen Rooney's husband??"

dear god, whats next, and what can be done to stop it?
Set up a new 'Standards Unit' who will operate covertly disguised as a TV crew asking dumb looking orange people questions like this. If they fail to answer correctly then they have to do a 'forefit'. Failure to comply will result in a severe slapping. Repeated failures will result in one way flight to America where they can be amongst like minded people!

Or alternitavely we can just call them all cnuts and get on with it.
Surely you'd send them to Scotland and Wales.
 
#5
doomandgloom said:
The_Cynic_Clinic said:
Halford1 said:
Just heard a story, Tv crew was interviewing random 20 sumthings in the street (all orange warriors, severe speech problems, but strangly alluring [perhaps this should go in the "people you fancy that you shouldnt" thread]) about the world cup.
Who is the England Captain? the reporter asks one: "eeeeerr, is it like Sven or someone?" now ill let that 'girl' off as if you didnt like football (shudder) you might not know.

However, a sad fact was then revealed about the celebrity (and i use the term very loosely) culture we live in.
the same question was asked to another girl, sporting a delicious velour pyjama suit, to which she replied: "isnt is Coleen Rooney's husband??"

dear god, whats next, and what can be done to stop it?
Set up a new 'Standards Unit' who will operate covertly disguised as a TV crew asking dumb looking orange people questions like this. If they fail to answer correctly then they have to do a 'forefit'. Failure to comply will result in a severe slapping. Repeated failures will result in one way flight to America where they can be amongst like minded people!

Or alternitavely we can just call them all cnuts and get on with it.
Surely you'd send them to Scotland and Wales.
I'd prefer a few time zones and one ocean between these cnuts and me.
 
#7
The_Cynic_Clinic said:
doomandgloom said:
The_Cynic_Clinic said:
Halford1 said:
Just heard a story, Tv crew was interviewing random 20 sumthings in the street (all orange warriors, severe speech problems, but strangly alluring [perhaps this should go in the "people you fancy that you shouldnt" thread]) about the world cup.
Who is the England Captain? the reporter asks one: "eeeeerr, is it like Sven or someone?" now ill let that 'girl' off as if you didnt like football (shudder) you might not know.

However, a sad fact was then revealed about the celebrity (and i use the term very loosely) culture we live in.
the same question was asked to another girl, sporting a delicious velour pyjama suit, to which she replied: "isnt is Coleen Rooney's husband??"

dear god, whats next, and what can be done to stop it?
Set up a new 'Standards Unit' who will operate covertly disguised as a TV crew asking dumb looking orange people questions like this. If they fail to answer correctly then they have to do a 'forefit'. Failure to comply will result in a severe slapping. Repeated failures will result in one way flight to America where they can be amongst like minded people!

Or alternitavely we can just call them all cnuts and get on with it.
Surely you'd send them to Scotland and Wales.
I'd prefer a few time zones and one ocean between these cnuts and me.
Good point, I never thought of it that way. Then why don't we just relocate Scotland and Wales in Siberia or Greenland? The land left over could make way for more prisons and immigration holding posts.

Sorry, I'm going a bit off thread already. I feel an O2 Thief/troll tag heading my way.
 
#12
I was watching the England game yesterday in a bar in Belfast City Centre.
Was approached by 3 chaps, pensionable age, the one who spoke had an English accent, or at least it sounded like one.

"Excuse me, who's playing?"
(I suspcted a a waaah, still not one hundred per cent sure it wasn't)
"England & Ecuador"

"Ohhh England, good, what's the score?"

BB:"nil-nil, at the moment, it's just started"

"Oh, right.... Who to?"

(at this point I was about to deliver a 'no waah' ... but it continues..


BB: "umm, nobody mate, nil-nil, no score..."

"Oh of course, yes... Is it a competition or something?"
BB: " yeees... It's the World Cup"

"Oh the World Cup" (to his friends) "It's England playing in the World Cup" (sounds of approval and excitement from friends)

"If England win will we see them get the cup before... Oh about six-ish?"

BB: "errr... No, this isn't the final"

"Oh right, not that important then" (to friends) "It's not the final.... Shall we just go for a walk?"
 

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