The smug Fourby thread

Discussion in 'Cars, Bikes 'n AFVs' started by TheIronDuke, Jan 30, 2010.

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  1. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    "Why must that ugly beast be upon our paddock? It stinks of diesel, it is filthy, it has no heater or handbrake and it makes a horrible clanking noise. Can one not weigh it in for scrap?"

    A constant refrain from Posh Bird.

    Not this morning when I used my lovely Landy to tow the Jag out of the drive, then pull her silly sports car out and spark up a fag, lean on the tailgate and watch her spin her little wheels, bless her.

    Six inches of snow and by God, I am not a swearing man, but I swear to fucking God that there is no better feeling on Gods green earth than buzzing past horrible little French cars in a big, fuck-off Fourby.

    Call me shallow, call me Ethal Merman if it'll make you happy, but heres nowt like driving a Landy in the snow.

    Weep and eat wormwood, hatchback scum.
  2. Who's Ethal Merman?
  3. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Me dear old Mum. Do we have a situation?
  4. Possibly a walt version of Ethel Merman

    ............unless His Dukeship was confused with that old trout Ethyl Merman who used to sing for gin down my local, years ago, The Dog and Vomit.
  5. I remember when the Demonization of 4x4 started I drove to work on morning, and there on the side of the road was an old 110 Landrover pulling a Toyota Prius out of a ditch.
    I smiled all the way to work!
  6. ugly

    ugly LE Moderator

    Sign up for the petition then!
  7. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    I'd love to but the snow has gone away.

    So its back to me comfy car. The Landy can rust in its yard up West Moor way. Till I need it again.

    But thanks for your interest. Do you want to buy a pre-cherished Landy? Mates Rates. PM me, yah?
  8. ugly

    ugly LE Moderator

    No Landies seem to have slowly shrunk in the drivers area since I last endured one!
  9. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer


    Now, glance in your mirror? You see that big fuck off Jaguar Sovereign V8 four inches off of your back bumper and not in the fucking mood?


    Landy's are not to be endured. Landy's are to be loved.

  10. I have a Discovery 2 as a comfy car.
    For other purposes I've just aquired a 1983 SerIII 109" soft top, very pleased with it I am too!
  11. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Has it got those horrible alloys they fitted do the Disco? Tell me it hasnt.
  12. The Discovery 2? Yes it has 18inch alloys with GG AT2's on. It came with them and if I'd known how bad big alloys are on a Discovery I would have bought 16's. Probably not the ones you are thinking of though, its a limited edition with different wheels to normal.
  13. I know what you mean Iron Duke even if I am across the ponds. I come from a snowy corner of the US and I sat at the base of a hill watching a Toyota Prius start up, skid a bit slise back, get a bit further up and slide off the shoulder. Nice new Prius and the back covered with stickers. One was "Obama, Socialism you can believe in" and several others that taken togeter said "Banallgunsand give gaywhales abortion choice" or something like that. As I drove by in my 4x4 Chevy Blazer I gave the woman a polite wave. I very briefly thought of stopping and hauling out a rope and then thinking of the bumper stickers said feck it.
  14. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    The Chevy Blazer is a decent motor. We hired one to drive from Provo, Utah to Biose Idaho a couple of years back, and it did well. In February in the snow. I wanted to hire one of them huge Dodge things. But the girl in Alamo Car Hire at Salt Lake City airport told me Jesus hates Dodge. Normally I would have questioned this. But it was Salt Lake City airport, and she seemed... focussed.

    I shunt Prius every chance I get. Fucking Aromatherapy Hippy bollocks battery driven shite what they are. Then I claim the insurance and have me Landy re-sprayed.