The Serpico benefit concert thread

I may be able to help you out.
Next doors cat keeps shitting on my astro turf.
If you could make that problem disappear, discreetly, it's worth thirty quid to yer.
I'd do it myself, but they still think I'm responsible for the demise of their last cat.

Which I am, sort of.
I didn't know that my home made weed killer would cause it to ignite.

Astro turf? in a garden ?
 

ColdWarWorrier

Old-Salt
Aye, so am really embarrassed to do this here lads. I've totally fucked my wallet this weekend, and I could really use a spot of 20 or 30 buck

I can sing, or do a bespoke rap

I feel your pain. I’ve just checked my bank account and I’ve only got just over 100 grand available (luckily my monthly pension payments hit the account this week).

Can’t spare any. I might need it. Sorry.
 
I feel your pain. I’ve just checked my bank account and I’ve only got just over 100 grand available (luckily my monthly pension payments hit the account this week).

Can’t spare any. I might need it. Sorry.
How is Zimbabwe this time of year?
 

ColdWarWorrier

Old-Salt
How is Zimbabwe this time of year?

Nope, just over 100,000 of your finest British Pounds Sterling - a result of selling a house in the South East of England for an obscene amount of money and buying a similar property in a cheaper, nicer and less congested part of the UK. All debts paid off and mortgage-free. Retirement plan worked as, err, planned. Only just 60 so still young and fit enough to enjoy my Ill-gotten gains.

I think I know how @Ravers feels.
 
Happy to contribute a litre or two of accelerant to make sure LCpl Trying-Way-Too-Fucĸing-Hard's farewell "Look At Me Everybody!!1" concert ends on the heart-warming note of his self-immolation.
 
Happy to contribute a litre or two of accelerant to make sure LCpl Trying-Way-Too-Fucĸing-Hard's farewell "Look At Me Everybody!!1" concert ends on the heart-warming note of his self-immolation.



Watch out, the creature will be alledging death threats to the mods and getting a crime number from the plod..... the useless cnut.


It's only banter, sadly.
 
Top