The reason Britains roads are clogged

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by msr, Feb 8, 2006.

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  1. msr

    msr LE

  2. Nah, the reason is mindless selfish b@astards driving along for miles in the middle lane when the inside is clear to the horizon, mostly in BMWs...........

    Oh, and the Feds for not nicking them for doing it - its the only way they'll learn.........
  3. Agree with both, plus w****ers doing 45mph in the rain without thier headlights on so you cant ever get past the b******ds!!

    Feel better for that!
  4. Having been a weekend commuter (bean stealer) for some time now, the hours I have spent watching the traffic up and down the M1 has led me to a number of conclusions as to why the traffic appears to move much slower than it could (not in any particular order - they all annoy the sh1t out of me):

    Overtaking lorries. One lorry overtaking another lorry at a speed diference of less than 10 mph takes up two thirds of the available carriageway therefore forcing the much faster car/van traffic into one lane.

    F*cking dimwits (no - not always women or the aged) sitting in the centre lane at 65mph no matter what. Again, this forces the rest of the traffic into one lane as well as giving an excuse to the tw*ts who undertake.

    Tw*ts who sit in the outside lane when the inner lanes are almost empty and will only swerve into the centre lane when the outside lane comes to a full stop due to the weight of traffic - almost taking out Mr F*ckwit who is still sitting in the centre lane or Mr Tw*t who is undertaking everybody. (Yes you - you with the short grey wearing a combat jacket driving a sh1t-coloured Astra estate on the M1 last Friday near Loughborough - did you not see that the majority of the traffic was going past you on the inside and THEN moving out to the outside lane - you w*anker). I especially liked the 800m gap in front of you - were your brakes shot? F*cking t*sser!

    Rubbernecking- be it at an accident or a Police car who is sitting at the side of the motorway givng either Mr F*ckwit or Mr Tw*t a ticket for undertaking/speeding/etc. What do you expect to see?

    Mr BMW/Mercedes/Suberu Imprezza - who think because their car can do 150 mph - they must try and achieve that speed at every opportunity and at 5m from rear of the car in front thereore preventing anyone from changing lanes. I especially like it when you make sure that your ABS works by stamping on the brakes because you were only observing traffic 5 metres ahead.

    W*nkers who leave 200m+ gaps in front of them whilst sitting in the middle or outside lane. Why?

    As ever in life, it's not one single reason for something that happens, it's a number of intertwined and related reasons that result in the traffic on Britains roads moving much slower than it could. The volume of traffic doesn't help either.

    I'm going for a lie down.
  5. I love motorways. I just floor it, to hell with anybody else.
  6. according to the local plod, 1 in 4 cars are on the road illegally, either no driving licence / no tax / no MOT / no insurance or a combination thereof. Solution, get them ALL off the road, draconian fines (£1K for each offence) and vehicle made into razor blades. Result, loads of room on the motorways, loads of revenue for the government so that can stop milking us
  7. Come out here and drive on the motorways of Eastern Europe! Most are new roads so the surface is excellent and the volume of traffick is very low. I normally cruise at 120+ mph. If you do get stopped by the Hungarian/Serbian/Croatian/Slovack/Czech police it is possible to either talk your way out of it or bribe them. Twice I have let a copper drive my car to see its top end and been let off with a 'please drive more slowly, and be careful, there is another speed trap in 20km'

    The worst drivers in the region are Austrians; technically they are good, but refuse to let you pass if they are doing the speed limit. Hitler was Austrian. Romanians and Albanians are so bad it is comical, but you expect them to do stupid things as soon as you recognise the country sticker.

    British roads would be a lot better if the thieving gypsy tax-man put a small percentage of fuel duty and road tax receipts towards maintenence, and the train companies were forced to charge realistic rates for cargo transportation (it is cheaper for a HGV to drive from Aberdeen to Southampton, including an overnight stop, than to put to load onto a train) as this should remove a large part of the HGV traffic from the motorways. Also hippies who object to cars and new roads should be forced to enter a register, and if they are ever found driving on a motorway, and driving anything but a Prius or other hybrid car, then they should be shot.

    Plod should also get off the motorway and only be there if there is an accident; too few people have the balls to overtake the cop car, resulting in a rolling roadblock of 65mph when everyone normally does 85-100.

    I have the joys of this to look forward to in May on the '06 Gumball; rozzers will be all over London and the M20 to the Tunnel :(
  8. One thing that really gets me is

    People who drive with fog lights on for no reason.

    In Germany there is an easy cure. Using fog lamps means visibility is less than 50m thus maximum speed can be no more than 50kmh (30mph) because of the safe braking distance. Any faster than that and you get done for dangerous driving! Simple.

    An inability to realise that unless you are overtaking you belong in the inside lane.

    I am how ever all for safe braking distances to the vehicle in front. Kinda makes sense...

    Just saw dreads post. All Austrian coppers are utter cnuts who wait for the tourist to tootle past before pulling them over for speeding. No speed camera or laser necessary. Why? Because they get to estimate your speed! They fecking guess and there is zilch you can do about it.
  9. Good point about the insurance. My insurance costs 2k per year. What would happen if UK plod catches me without it? I end up in a magistrate's court and get a 150 quid fine.

    Chances of being stopped by the police more than 10 times a year = 0. So where is the incentive for a cnut to pay for his insurance? Fair enough, I would soon loose my job as my employer would be peeved with my lawbreaking, but it is no deterrant to the average chav wnaker (chavs on roads in crappy astras should also be shot on sight).
  10. ViroBono

    ViroBono LE Moderator

    Red Nissan Micras are the Devil's cars. I am convinced that there is some sort of 'grey conspiracy' amongst old people to put these wretched roller-skates on the roads to obstruct everyone else.

    Just try it - next time you are held up in a queue of traffic, see what's at the front - it's always a red Nissan Micra driven by a geriatric!

    It's getting so bad I'm thinking of lining my car with tinfoil.
  11. WTF are you driving? (or do you have a bad record?)
  12. Old people should take a reflex test every year and if their reaction time is worse than someone over the drink drive limit they should have their licences permanently removed.

    Edited for semantics and mong spelling!
  13. I think the big wide roads with the blue signs are great. I have lots of room in my lane, and I use the lanes to my left and right as a saftey zone in case I wander a bit.

    I do get a bit upset when the big trucks come past me in the lane on my left, are they really allowed to do that? Thanks to all of the people that flash their lights at me to say hello before they over take, some even take the time to wave as they go past, again thank you.

    Wah . . . . In fact this year I made a new years resolution to stay calm and not get frustrated I will also try not to nudge such pr@ts out of the middle lane, or swerve accross them from right to left having just overtaken. My resolution lasted until I was on the M3 on 03 Jan. The whole f'king road was empty apart from about 5 cars and one pr@t still sat in the center lane - -W@nker.

    Fog lights on because its raining W@nkers
    Center lane club W@nkers
    Queing behind a lorry on the inside lane of a motorway because they do not know how to change lanes W@nkers
    Doing 40 along a 60MPH 'A' road because they never go above 40 W@nkers
    Caravans - -nuff said W@nkers
    Tractors on the raod between 0700 and 0900 and then again between 1600 and 1700 W@ankers
    Waiting at roundabouts and other Give Way lines, when its clear to go W@nkers
    Not using indicators W@nkers
    Mothers taking kids to school in a 4x4 they cannot dive above 30 MPH Tw@ts
    Motor cyclist without lights W@nkers

    As fo me - well I am Mr Perfect of course . . . . . W@nker for getting caught by a camera !!
  14. Im in court myself 1st march, because I let the poilsh guy i work with try our roads. 11.30 at night, no ****** on the road, except for plod who stops us because hes driving in the hedge almost. End result, ill probably lose my license, as I already have 6 points. What does everyone reckon?

    Sure I'll plead poverty, because I'm skint. I'm aiming to set up a business in March, if/when I get the funding, without a car I'll be stuffed.

    I thought it was a £200 quid fine? Or does it depoend on area? Dyfed-Powys are but-raping me at the moment.
  15. 2002 Lotus Esprit V8 and a 2005 Maserati Quattroporte


    Never had a claim. Cover is high as they are Guernsey registered cars but I keep them in Eastern Europe.